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File 134317873505.gif - (20.16KB , 640x400 , banner.gif )
435947 No. 435947 ID: 147853

It's my first quest! Go easy on me, this was a impulse. And I don't know how to use the boards that well. Help? Anyways... onwards!

It's time to enter Hagtrows! Enter character here:

Name:
Age:
Sex:
Location on Body:
Symbol:
Expand all images
>>
No. 435950 ID: 886a4d

Circe
3700 years old
Female
Left Breast
A boar in chains.
>>
No. 435952 ID: 997ce7

Puce Bloomers
Hermaphrodite
sq. root of negative 16
Retina
Klein bottle
>>
No. 435953 ID: f5832c

Name: jenny Trotter
Age: 16 in body 48 in sarcasm
Sex: hopefully
Location on Body: the top
Symbol: t'-'t (a man giving two middle fingers)
>>
No. 435958 ID: e7e90d

Serlcixe
No, she doesn't.
Lesbian.
Above the left knee
Spirograph.
>>
No. 435959 ID: a7a256

> It's time to enter Hagtrows!
Yay!

> Name
Gulcasa!

> Age
Thirteen!

> Sex
Male...

> Location on Body
Neck, armpits and inner thighs! Wait, what?

> Symbol
Heart! An anatomically correct human heart! Because heart is awesome!

You can always check out the FAQ and use the Quest Advice thread in Quest Discussion. Take your time and good luck!
>>
No. 435963 ID: 84185f

>>435952
+1
>>
No. 435987 ID: 147853
File 134318369310.gif - (37.45KB , 1000x650 , GulliganCassidyBloom.gif )
435987

Name: Gulligan Cassidy Bloom
Age: 13
Sex: Male

You have a MAGENTA HEART SHAPE on the back of your neck, and in a couple other embarrasing places on your body. Some people used to call it pink, but you beat them up. You're not sure where it came from, but you wish it was more like... a realistic heart at least. With veins and blood and junk. That would be pretty manly.

You've gotten pretty used to it by now.
>>
No. 435989 ID: 147853
File 134318386424.gif - (66.81KB , 1000x650 , 1gulligansroom.gif )
435989

Right now you're bored out of your mind.

You've been grounded all summer, after you got expelled from the last Junior High School within an hours commute.

You tend to BRAWL a lot. You think you're a pretty cool guy, but the fact that you have no friends tends to add to your BOREDOM.

Luckily school should be starting soon, so they can't lock you up in your ROOM much longer.

You vaguely wonder what hellhole they'll be sending you to next.

What do you do?
>>
No. 435992 ID: 299ed3

Cast magic missile.
>>
No. 435997 ID: a7a256

> Some people used to call it pink, but you beat them up.
Attaboy! Can't use brawls forever, though. Gotta come up with something else.

> What do you do?
Books, action figures, poster with a dragon roasting someone, aquarium with BADASS fish. What more do we have here?
>>
No. 436052 ID: 147853
File 134319556778.gif - (15.38KB , 640x400 , 2dorks.gif )
436052

> Cast magic missile.

Magic isn't real. And there's no darkness to attack here anyways, duh.
>>
No. 436053 ID: e7e90d

>Male
>Chronically bored
>Beats people up
>Doesn't believe in magic

Jeeze, do you have any redeeming features? Aside being blessed with hearing voices.
>>
No. 436054 ID: 6a1ec2

Extrude cruxite dowel.
>>
No. 436055 ID: 147853
File 134319597133.gif - (54.88KB , 1000x650 , 2toys.gif )
436055

> Attaboy! Can't use brawls forever, though. Gotta come up with something else.
What? Why? Punching things works pretty well. You just hit them with your fist and eventually they stop bugging you.

You've gotten out of like... a billion different schools that way so far.

Books, action figures, poster with a dragon roasting someone, aquarium with BADASS fish. What more do we have here?

Unfortunately all your COOL STUFF was taken away when you were grounded most recently. Your dad did his best, but mom was being a... uh... ...

Wow, you can't even curse at her in your head. She's got you trained pretty well now.

Your fish's name is Fish. He used to be pretty small, but he just kept getting bigger and bigger. Your mistake was probably trying to feed him your little sister's gerbil, after that he's been eating his weight of mice and junk. He's been fine for a while, but he hardly fits in his tank any more... and the way he's been eyeing you has been getting kinda creepy.

You're getting kinda hungry actually, but mom'll probably throw a fit if you go down for lunch early... do you want to kill time in here, or sneak out, or what?
>>
No. 436057 ID: 6a1ec2

Deploy totem lathe.
>>
No. 436059 ID: 147853

Jeeze, do you have any redeeming features?

What? Weren't those ALL redeeming features? You're not some sort of baby who lives in candyland and still beleives in the tooth fairy. If magic existed, it'd be sick. But it doesn't, so there's no point whining about it like a pansy.

It's not your fault your bored anyways, you've been stuck in here almost all summer, you've read all your books like a billion times, and all your cool swords and stuff and medieval sh- uh... stuff got taken away.

stuff about cruxite dowels and totem lathes etc

That sounds like stuff some pansy-assed practical jokester who beleived in paranormal crap and toothfairies would do. Screw those guys.

Man... fish's really eyeing me creepy now... I wanna get out of this room...
>>
No. 436060 ID: 147853
File 134319722685.gif - (26.05KB , 640x400 , 2halfpout.gif )
436060

oops, forgot the image.
>>
No. 436065 ID: bf54a8

bug family
>>
No. 436082 ID: 6e44d2

Sneak out and wander the streets pissed off. Maybe you can find someone to provoke into a fight.
>>
No. 436096 ID: a7a256

> Your mistake was probably trying to feed him your little sister's gerbil, after that he's been eating his weight of mice and junk.
Jerk move, you douche. Even if your sister provoked you, the gerbil had nothing to do with it. Fish is creepy for a reason, now you're just a juicy and tasty big piece of meat to him.

> What? Why? Punching things works pretty well.
You're not stupid, you understood what I meant there.

You don't stand to every stuff they throw at you. That's good, you have some self-respect. However, this also means that you are easily shaken by what others say and do, that you want their approval. You need to be more confident, believe in yourself. There are things you can't win with just your fists, really important and good things.

I'm not giving a sermon, I'm taking you and your stuff seriously. Words alone aren't enough, though.

>>436065
Yeah, go bug your family. Go get dad, you need to talk with mom.

What you did was wrong? You don't go around provoking others, messing with their stuff. Someone tried to help you, to understand you? You're just defending yourself the way you know, because nobody else seems to care.

>>436057
To enter a nightmare where you can do nothing and have to deal with it? No, thank you very much.
>>
No. 436178 ID: 6a1ec2

Use hand on door knob.
>>
No. 436393 ID: 147853
File 134328314913.gif - (25.88KB , 640x400 , 3bashfull.gif )
436393

> Positive comments about self-respect and solving problems positively.

Yeah well, if that worked so well, things would be a bit different now wouldn't they? Let's face it, nobody cares about you.

You do feel kind of bad about your little sister's gerbil... she didn't seem too fazed by it after the first week though, she only cried for a few hours anyways...

Okay, yeah, you feel like a bit of a jerk. You're never going to tell her that though. Maybe you can make it up to her or something...

> You need to talk to mom.

Don't you wish? You can't talk with mom. It's more like "get talked at."

> Do something stupid.Sneak out and wander the streets pissed off. Maybe you can find someone to provoke into a fight.

Now there's a thought! Something right up your alley!

Let's just hope Mom isn't home... she always catches you when you're trying to break out.
>>
No. 436396 ID: 147853
File 134328325113.gif - (22.74KB , 640x400 , 3footdoor.gif )
436396

> Use hand on door knob.

Sure!

Wait, no, that's boring. You'll use your foot instead.

You've always been pretty coordinated, so it doesn't take long to fumble the door open.
>>
No. 436397 ID: 4a328b

Bring the lighter
>>
No. 436399 ID: 147853
File 134328339086.gif - (21.72KB , 640x400 , 3stairs.gif )
436399

Stealth mode activated!

Sneaking out is going to take all your concentration and effort. First obstacle! The kitchen! Sounds like someone's inside, you hear singing, but it's hard to tell who exactly.

Attack or evade?
>>
No. 436401 ID: 886a4d

Your mom have long hair or short? And does your dad cook? Both can help determine whos in the kitchen.
>>
No. 436402 ID: 6a1ec2

Watch out for those stairs, bro!
>>
No. 436407 ID: 147853
File 134328384199.gif - (79.07KB , 640x400 , 3halffire.gif )
436407

> Bring the lighter.

Unfortunately, that's one of your confiscated "cool stuff"s. You think your mom locked it either in her office, or in their bedroom. You're not sure which one. She could have hid your stuff anywhere!

You'd love to bring your lighter though. You two have had some good times together.
>>
No. 436413 ID: 147853

Your mom have long hair or short? And does your dad cook? Both can help determine whos in the kitchen.

Both have short hair and both cook. The only one in your family who doesn't do either would be your little sister.
>>
No. 436414 ID: 886a4d

Does your dad wear pink when cooking?
>>
No. 436417 ID: bd5edb

> You can't talk with mom. It's more like "get talked at."
A direct confrontation isn't an option, therefore. You need a plan. What can you say about your family?

> You've always been pretty coordinated.
What other tricks can you do?

> Attack or evade?
ATTACK!!
>>
No. 436466 ID: 147853
File 134331161481.gif - (29.33KB , 640x400 , 4what.gif )
436466

Does your dad wear pink when cooking?
What? What sort of difference does that make? How would you even know without looking?
>>
No. 436467 ID: 147853
File 134331181774.gif - (26.98KB , 640x400 , 4attack.gif )
436467

Family

Your family is pretty normal, I guess. You've got a mother, father, and a little sister. Possibly an older sibling too, but you've never been too clear on that.

Tricks Cool tricks? What? You've popped a 180 bmxing pretty successfully before. You tend to be good at most everything you do, and you're pretty lucky.

Winning seems to run in the family.

ATTACK!

You are a man of action! No use waiting around! You spring into action!
>>
No. 436468 ID: 147853
File 134331187801.gif - (25.06KB , 640x400 , 4oops.gif )
436468

Oops.

"Gulligan! What was that for?! I was just on my way up to bring you some freshly baked cookies!"

Noooooo! Not the cookies! They're ruined now!
>>
No. 436471 ID: 24f833

...you attacked your mother. And cookies.

What the hell is wrong with you?

Get a freaking hold of yourself, help her up, and apologize profusely, or so held me, I'm going to spend the rest of my life as voice inside your head singing the most annoying songs I can think of on infinite loop. You horrible person.
>>
No. 436484 ID: 4c4acb

Attacking someone who is providing cookies is bad and you should feel bad. Also attacking your mother in general isn't a very good idea either.
>>
No. 436491 ID: bd5edb

> Maybe you can find someone to provoke into a fight.
That was fast! You didn't need to leave home!

> KISS THE COOK
Wait, no!
>>
No. 436667 ID: 147853
File 134335303380.gif - (82.85KB , 640x400 , 4halfmom.gif )
436667

...you attacked your mother. What's wrong with you? What? No. Just no. For one thing, you leapt before the cookie-bearer had come into sight.

Those poor poor cookies.

Second... That's dad right there. Nobody'd want to fight him anyways, he's a total pus- uh... pacifist.

(And no, you're not going to kiss your dad in a million years. He's overly affectionate as it is.)


Mom's more like this.

Thank God it wasn't actually mom... *shudder*
>>
No. 436700 ID: bd5edb

> Those poor poor cookies.
One good thing about cookies is that you can always do more. Anyway, apologize and go help dad. Chop chop!

> Nobody'd want to fight him anyways, he's a total pus- uh... pacifist.
How did your parents meet? How is their relationship?

> And no, you're not going to kiss your dad in a million years. He's overly affectionate as it is.
You're going to miss his cookies, though.
>>
No. 436823 ID: 147853
File 134336984646.gif - (24.33KB , 479x469 , 5dad.gif )
436823

> Anyway, apologize and go help dad. Chop chop!

"Not a problem, my lad! Your old man's made of sterner stuff than that!" Even so, he totter's a bit as he stands up. He's never been all that tough, really. He tries to pretend for your sake though. Weird as he is, you like to think you get along pretty well with him.

"Too bad about the cookies. I made more, but they're for your sister's birthday party this weekend. I thought I'd give you some now, because... well... you know."

Yeah, you know all right. As part of your "punishment" mom also took away your birthday party. It was supposed to be tomorrow.

Well, it's not like you had any friends to invite anyways...

You still really want cookies now though. What to do? Maybe you can sneak away from your dad and then...?

Art program change. Can you tell? Probably not. Haha.
>>
No. 436827 ID: 147853
File 134337012761.gif - (56.63KB , 800x600 , 5parents.gif )
436827

> You're going to miss his cookies, though.
Yes. Yes you will. Unless...?

> How did your parents meet? How is their relationship?

You guess your parents get along pretty well. You've never heard them fight or anything, but you assume that's just because your dad's a big pushover.

He's pretty wussy. You always just assumed Mom saved him from muggers one day, and didn't dare leave him alone since, just out of pure pity that he'd end up picked on my small chihuahua's until he starved to death.

Well, maybe that's exaggerated. It wouldn't surprise you though.

I hope you can all tell what's going on in that picture, because if you haven't noticed, what our "hero" beleives isn't always exactly true.
>>
No. 436860 ID: bd5edb

Your dad really cares about you, you should respect him more. Besides, it takes some guts and wits to be able to deal with things without a fight. He may not be made ​​of tough stuff, but he can handle things with a smile. Wouldn't surprise me if he had your mom charmed.

> As part of your "punishment" mom also took away your birthday party.
Harsh. What you did to deserve this?

> Unless...?
You learn how to cook. Maybe you could do something for the anniversary of your little sister and say that you regret what you did with the gerbil. Anyway, what you can say about your little sister?

> You still really want cookies now though. What to do?
Shush! Your father will probably make another batch for you. You may get some snacks, though. Let's raid the fridge.
>>
No. 436923 ID: 6a1ec2

Lick the floor. Liiiiick it.
>>
No. 437138 ID: 147853
File 134350887678.gif - (32.65KB , 800x600 , 6fight.gif )
437138

Your dad really cares about you, you should respect him more. Besides, it takes some guts and wits to be able to deal with things without a fight. He may not be made ​​of tough stuff, but he can handle things with a smile. Wouldn't surprise me if he had your mom charmed.If you couldn't tell, his dad really did essentially charm his mom. She's the tough girl who probably didn't get much attention, but he wooed her with all his might after she protected him from a dragon. If you couldn't tell from the last image. No, you actually respect your dad a lot. Actually, the last fight you got in came because a couple guys from the year up in school were making fun of him. That's that shi- uh... stuff don't fly.

That doesn't make him any less weak.

> Harsh. What you did to deserve your punishment?
You don't beat around the bush, except literally maybe. You're a brawler. It seems to be the quickest way to end most problems, and so far it's gotten you out of 12 different schools! (You don't care for school very much.)

However, this most recent brawl got you kicked out of the last school within an hours drive, and neither of your parents really has the time to drive you farther every day. Your mom was pretty pissed off.

At least the school still let you pass the grade.
>>
No. 437145 ID: 147853
File 134350957888.gif - (47.28KB , 800x600 , 6lickit.gif )
437145

> You learn how to cook. Maybe you could do something for the anniversary of your little sister and say that you regret what you did with the gerbil.
Yeah, you keep getting the feeling you've been kind of a jerk lately, and you keep getting all these thoughts about how you need to fix your life. "apologize to your mom who is actually your dad" they said. "apologize to your sister" they said. "you're a horrible person" they said. You'd start getting a bit depressed, but your testosterone infused awesomeness puts a set limit on the amount of regret you're allowed to feel at once.

That being said, never too late to do something. You are a man of ACTION after all!

"Hey dad! Want to teach me to cook? I kind of want to make something for Sherlie's birthday."

"Hey, of course Kiddo! That sounds like a great idea!"

Your dad's kind of an optimist. But honestly, it's not likely for anything to go wrong. You tend to be pretty awesome at everything you do, it's inherited.

You bend down and help him clean up the cookies.

> Lick the floor. Liiiiick it.

You're almost done when you notice crumbs have gotten all over the floor. Delicious morsels...

Must... lick... floor...


"Gulligan? What are you doing?"

"Uhh..."

Your dad looks very disappointed with you.

"That's not very gentlemanly of you, son."
>>
No. 437148 ID: 6a1ec2

Lick the floor in a more hardboiled manner.
>>
No. 437150 ID: 147853
File 134351077074.gif - (23.15KB , 800x600 , 6SherilynCaelixeBloom.gif )
437150

>Anyway, what you can say about your little sister? Everyone always says that your sister takes after your dad, while you take after your mom. You're not sure what you think about taking after your mom, as she's pretty terrifying. You can see that your sister takes after Dad though.

Only, she pulls it off much better. Basically, every seems to love her the same way everyone seems to hate you.

This used to bother you a lot. She's only a year younger than you. (exactly one year actually, to the day.) You do feel very protective of her, even if you pick on her all the time. You're not sure she really knows that you care at all.

Name: Sherilyn Caelixe Bloom
Age: 12
Sex: Female

though to be honest, you're GOING TO BE 13. And she's GOING to be 12.

Tomorrow, actually. Wow. That's pretty weird.
>>
No. 437151 ID: 842d23

Okay, let's clear something up. There's nothing wrong with being a fighter, or a brawler. Your problem is you don't have anywhere useful to point your combative impulses. It shouldn't be aimed at your family.

We gotta find you a purpose, kid.
>>
No. 437152 ID: 147853

> Lick the floor in a more hardboiled manner.

You have no eggs.
>>
No. 437156 ID: 147853
File 134351218360.gif - (28.06KB , 800x600 , 6halfcake.gif )
437156

Your dad has assigned you the lofty task of making the cake! He was going to do this himself, but he's pretty excited by the fact that you want to do this.


We gotta find you a purpose, kid.

Right now, your purpose is cake ingredients!

> Okay, let's clear something up. There's nothing wrong with being a fighter, or a brawler. Your problem is you don't have anywhere useful to point your combative impulses.

That's a really great thought! You enjoy being positive. You also enjoy fighting. Maybe some muggers or punks or something will give you a reason to "have a little fun" while you're out cruising for cake stuff today!

You have three choices. The Kwik Mart by the gas station just down the street. That's closest, and you'd be home in no time. If they had everything you need.

The STAR*Mart has a little bit of everything, is the next closest, but also doesn't have that great quality of stuff.

The RALPHERSONS would take you about an hour to get there by bike, but you'd have everything you need to make an AWESOME birthday cake.

Your sister's favorite colors are pink and blue by the way. You assume because she's a little miss girly girl, you never really understood how she thinks.
>>
No. 437158 ID: 842d23

Um, for the record? Trying to combine fighting baddies and keep up important commitments to your family at the same time? Almost always blows up in your. It's a basic superhero trope.

So concentrate on one thing at a time. Cake now. Beating up baddies later.

If you'll still have time to make the cake if you take the longer route, go that way. Better supplies, and you can burn off some energy with all the exercise.
>>
No. 437183 ID: 1d084b

Admitting your own mistakes is something that requires great courage and determination. It's kind hard and depressing, but you'll come out stronger after that. Furthermore, almost everyone can be physically strong, but that alone means nothing from the moment we created weapons. Regardless, it's tottaly cool how much you like your father. He never had to use fear and brawns to win your respect, though.

Anyway, you're a good big bro! It's kinda cute! Your sister may realize that if you become more honest with yourself. What are your feelings, however? You don't like being terrifying, yet you enjoy fighting. That's how you impose yourself on others, that's the only kind of respect you can get by force. How would you like to be seen by others, then? I thought that you got into fights only to defend something important.

> RALPHERSONS
> AWESOME
You don't do things by halves. Let's go.
>>
No. 437270 ID: 147853
File 134354617542.gif - (40.34KB , 800x600 , 7ready.gif )
437270

> Furthermore, almost everyone can be physically strong.
Not in your experience. For instance, Dad has a problem even with heavy lifting. And you, personally, tend not to lose fights.

He never had to use fear and brawns to win your respect, though.
Dad can DO that with people though, you never could. He's pretty awesome, and easy to get along with.

You can also beat him at arm wrestling. He used to try, just to impress you. He's a cool guy.

> Um, for the record? Trying to combine fighting baddies and keep up important commitments to your family at the same time? Almost always blows up in your. It's a basic superhero trope. Nonsense. Haven't you ever seen Cake Dance?

[color=green}> Anyway, you're a good big bro! It's kinda cute! Your sister may realize that if you become more honest with yourself. What are your feelings, however? You don't like being terrifying, yet you enjoy fighting. That's how you impose yourself on others, that's the only kind of respect you can get by force. How would you like to be seen by others, then? I thought that you got into fights only to defend something important. [/color]
You... have no idea. Like... Defenders of Justice are kinda cool and all, but they probably try not to make their lil' sis cry as much as you've done in the past...

You get your bike out of the garage.
>>
No. 437271 ID: 147853
File 134354627717.gif - (44.39KB , 800x600 , 7biking.gif )
437271

But that's old news. It's time for some AWESOME.

You don't do things by halves. Let's go.

> RALPHERSONS AWESOME.

Let's try to kick it out in half an hour, cut that time down to size! That should still give you plenty of time to make a cake by tomorrow, just like you want to.

You'll take a short cut through the park.

Shortcuts always work right?
>>
No. 437272 ID: 147853
File 134354636905.gif - (29.09KB , 800x600 , 7suddenly.gif )
437272

Suddenly: A short hairy midget guy jumps out in front of you! He's jumping up and down and waving his arms and legs around!

What do you do?
>ATTACK
>EVADE
>>
No. 437313 ID: 214bf9

>CAPTURE
>>
No. 437319 ID: 842d23

Just blow by him. He's got short stubby legs, he can't magically keep up with your bike or anything. Besides, you're on a mission, you don't have time to deal with annoying gnomes.
>>
No. 437322 ID: 1d084b

My first impression is that he isn't very smart, you can't just stop abruptly. He seems really preoccupied with something, maybe it's an emergency. Dodge and brake. Let's see what he wants, this will not cost you more than five minutes.
>>
No. 437333 ID: 147853
File 134358005180.gif - (35.74KB , 800x600 , 8snatch.gif )
437333


> Just blow by him. He's got short stubby legs, he can't magically keep up with your bike or anything. Besides, you're on a mission, you don't have time to deal with annoying gnomes.

> My first impression is that he isn't very smart, you can't just stop abruptly. He seems really preoccupied with something, maybe it's an emergency. Dodge and brake. Let's see what he wants, this will not cost you more than five minutes.



All true. It wouldn't take but five minutes, but you also don't HAVE five minutes to spare. Where's your sense of commitment! We're in this to the end! Bring it on, Ralphersons!

> CAPTURE

Clearly this is the only option left.

You combine all three of your thoughts. Your tires screech as you drift behind him, and you almost lay your bike down.

Without losing much speed, you manage to grab him and propel your self back into an upright position, plopping him on the handlebars as the wind whisks by.

Full speed ahead!
>>
No. 437336 ID: 147853
File 134358034461.gif - (49.96KB , 800x600 , 8gnomeyride.gif )
437336

He looks amazingly unperturbed for one having been suddenly yanked onto some kid's bike while maintaining a pretty high rate of travel.

More or less. His voice shakes as he tries to speak over the loudness of the wind.

Come to think of it, that ears and hat of his are kind of weird. What does he think he is, some sort of garden gnome? Did you just kidnap a crazy person?

"YOU... YOU MUST COME WITH ME... NOW!" He shouts at you. Well, speaks loudly at you. The wind is pretty loud.

He's also doing a better job maintaining his balance than you would have thought.
>>
No. 437338 ID: 842d23

Chastise him for missing the obvious opportunity to quote Terminator. And then point out he's technically coming with you, already.
>>
No. 437359 ID: 6a1ec2

Unless it involves you, me and delicious confectionary goods, you can go fuck yourself.
>>
No. 437380 ID: 1d084b

Where is his education? No introduction, no letter or phone call in advance, and yelling at you. If you weren't busy driving your bike and buying ingredients for a fabulous cake, you'd give him a nice beating.
>>
No. 437827 ID: 147853
File 134376157999.gif - (41.56KB , 800x600 , 9loud.gif )
437827

You're still going pretty fast.

>Chastise him for missing the obvious opportunity to quote Terminator. And then point out he's technically coming with you, already.

"Don't you mean 'Come with me if you want to live'?"

"Wind?"

It seems like he can't hear you over the wind. Though he does have huge batlike ears, the wind is carrying the sound behind you, and there's a lot rush past. It's pretty loud.

"I SAID THE LINE GOES 'COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE' YOU LITTLE BAS-"

"WHAT?" Okay, this is ridiculous.

"YOU KNOW, TECHNICALLY YOU'RE THE ONE COMING WITH ME ALREADY."

"WHAT?"

Uhg. Nevermind.

>Unless it involves you, me and delicious confectionary goods, you can go fuck yourself.

"WHAT?"

Okay, why did you think that would work by this point? You're getting kinda sick of the little freak now, honestly.
>>
No. 437828 ID: 147853
File 134376178699.gif - (37.98KB , 800x600 , 9pow.gif )
437828

>Where is his education? No introduction, no letter or phone call in advance, and yelling at you. If you weren't busy driving your bike and buying ingredients for a fabulous cake, you'd give him a nice beating.

Being busy driving your bike never stopped you from doin' nuttin.

He's not really worth beating up though. He looks like a shrimp.

You feel charitable enough to give him a good left cross though.

POW.

He quite easily loses his balance and goes flying off into the bushes.
>>
No. 437830 ID: 147853
File 134376219723.gif - (57.53KB , 800x600 , 9ralphersons.gif )
437830

20 minutes later you arrive at the ralphersons.


Wait... did the little guy take your wallet?

You could have sworn you brought it. You double checked!

How can you get cake ingredients without your wallet?
>>
No. 437832 ID: c1a7db

Right, that's done. Obviously there will never be any negative consequences from this, ever.

Get your supplies, then get home. If possible, take a different route or street so he can't jump you again on the way back.

>ingredients without money
I assume you have your father's credit card number memorized, young scallywag?
>>
No. 437833 ID: b85f8c

>>437830
Why are there no cars? Is the place closed?
>>
No. 437841 ID: 1d084b

> Wait... did the little guy take your wallet?
There's only one way to know. Go after him.
>>
No. 437843 ID: 147853
File 134376528583.gif - (34.00KB , 800x600 , 9halfexpress.gif )
437843

>There's only one way to know. Go after him.

No time for that now! You have not yet begun to bake!

>Why are there no cars? Is the place closed?

Well, those empty spaces in front actually just say "reserved parking". You've never actually seen anyone park there before.

That said, you're pretty sure the store is open. Looks like it's not crowded today though.

>I assume you have your father's credit card number memorized, young scallywag?

You're not thinking of being dishonest, are you? Well, admittedly, yes. Yes you are. You happen to have memorized a few of your parents credit card numbers, but you're trying to turn a new leaf here!

And actually, you have your dad's debit card tucked into your shoe. He never minded you borrowing it before, so you tend to keep it on you "just in case."

Though, admittedly, you're not sure he ever KNEW about you borrowing it before.

You're not exactly sure where his money comes from, in any case.

It doesn't actually have his name on it, but you found it in his dresser, after you were first grounded. Back when you were looking for your "cool stuff".

Since then you've been bringing it with you when you've snuck out. Just in case. It seems to work pretty well so far.
>>
No. 437846 ID: c1a7db

Magic debit card! Clearly nothing can go wrong with this plan.

Go ahead, it's for a good cause. Your parents can't really complain about you spending money on an errand they sent you on. You could always repay them later if bothers you (you know, another day, after you recover your wallet). Leave the money in the drawer where you found the card.
>>
No. 437848 ID: 1d084b

Only cake ingredients. After this you'll return to dad his debit card and all the money you took from him. From now on if you want some money you should ask mon and dad. Or get a job like delivering newspapers, mowing the lawn, professional wrestling or being a model for women's clothing.
>>
No. 437857 ID: 147853
File 134376862865.gif - (39.16KB , 800x600 , 9halfstuff.gif )
437857

>Magic debit card! Clearly nothing can go wrong with this plan.

Magic doesn't exist. This is just a normal, if mysterious debit card. Why are you thinking about magic so much lately?

Otherwise, true. You are a genius. Your plans never go wrong! Except all those times they did... but this is clearly another matter!

You decide to go ahead and use the card. I mean, where could that go wrong? You'll pay it back later. After you don't need the card anymore.

Now... do you even know what needs to go into a cake?

The store layout and selection is somewhat baffling. This place has way too much.
>>
No. 437863 ID: 886a4d

The only thing on that shelf that you need is the cake frosting. Do you have flour, eggs, sugar, butter and milk at home? You'll need vanilla extract and a few other miscellaneous ingredients depending on the cake you are making... whats your sisters favorite?

Also a frosting piper might be good if you don't have one at home. You can put a nice message on the cake with that.
>>
No. 437867 ID: 1d084b

> Now... do you even know what needs to go into a cake?
You need love. And a bit of yay.
>>
No. 437869 ID: 886a4d

>>437867
Hmm perhaps we can make a test muffin with Yay and Love to see how it effects the recipe... ask the owner the effects of the products before buying though.
>>
No. 437880 ID: c1a7db

>The only thing on that shelf that you need is the cake frosting. Do you have flour, eggs, sugar, butter and milk at home?

No no no. Trying to bake with the flour and eggs you have at home is preposterous Murphy bait. Every time you try it, you'll run out. Buy enough supplies so even if you fuck up and waste some, you can still complete the cake.

Store bought frosting isn't great. Make your own! All you need is sugar, cream cheese, and color/flavoring.
>>
No. 437891 ID: 94c170

>>437863
>separate icing piper
Use a plastic bag with the corner cut off. All you need.
>>
No. 438018 ID: 147853
File 134380050328.gif - (17.03KB , 800x600 , 9love.gif )
438018

Love #9. Smells like turpentine and looks like Indian Ink.

No need to ask about it. It's probably fine.
>>
No. 438019 ID: 147853
File 134380081659.gif - (31.28KB , 800x600 , 10buy.gif )
438019

>Store bought isn't great. Make your own!

You're not really sure what your sister likes as far as cake goes... you probably should have planned this out better.

As such, you decide to just go ahead and buy everything you could conceivably need in order to make a good cake. And you throw a couple of those environment friendly eco-bags for good measure, less likely to break down the road than plastic bags are.

It's racked up quite a total. But Dad never has seemed to want for money, and you're going to pay him back anyways.
>>
No. 438021 ID: 147853
File 134380090993.gif - (24.76KB , 800x600 , 10overdrawn.gif )
438021

Uh oh...

What, what? How does that... Security?

Hold on a second here...
>>
No. 438022 ID: 147853
File 134380099728.gif - (36.47KB , 800x600 , 10runaway.gif )
438022

"Hey Kid! Get back here!"

Before waiting for your mind to catch up, your body grabs your stuff and starts moving.

It's go time.

Well, at least that saves you the decision.
>>
No. 438068 ID: 147853

I should note, you do have more options available than just running away by this point. Go ahead, be creative.
>>
No. 438077 ID: 6a1ec2

How the hell does a credit card get overdrawn? Fucking magic how do they work! Anyway that guy is big but he's just the bagger not security. Let's see if he gets paid enough to catch you!
>>
No. 438078 ID: c1a7db

Usually when a card is denied, they just have you try again. And then they ask you if you have another. Security descending on you immediately is kind of crazy.
>>
No. 438147 ID: 1d084b

Get inside a women's clothing store, pick up some clothes and hide in a stall.
>>
No. 440206 ID: 147853
File 134437462514.gif - (19.37KB , 800x600 , 11Stromnords.gif )
440206

>Get inside a women's clothing store, pick up some clothes and hide in a stall.

You duck into the JCStromnords next door.

You're pretty sure they'll follow you inside, but maybe the fact that it's a women's clothing store will inspire some level of intrinsic fear in the big muscle-y bagger dude.
>>
No. 440208 ID: 147853
File 134437484090.gif - (32.28KB , 800x600 , 11sneaksneak.gif )
440208

>Usually when a card is denied, they just have you try again. And then they ask you if you have another. Security descending on you immediately is kind of crazy.

Yeah, totally, right? Something's fishy here. You're kind of upset that you lost you're cool, now you've become an accidental thief, and it probably would have been straightened out in a jip if you hadn't darted.

>How the hell does a credit card get overdrawn? Anyway that guy is big but he's just the bagger not security. Let's see if he gets paid enough to catch you!

It was a debit card.

Anyways, they'll probably be here any minute.

You can't catch a stall, that big guy would have you cornered. Where should you hide or otherwise ditch them?
>>
No. 440211 ID: d6c330

Well, crossdressing is the conventional way to avoid pursuers in this situation, but as you have no money, you'd have to steal the clothes too, and you're back at square one when you try to walk out and the alarms go off.

You could try ducking out the back door (most mall shops, especially the bigger ones) have emergency exits of loading doors to the outside, but again, you might set off an alarm.

I think doubling back might work. Hide, he comes in looking for you, and then you sneak back out the same entrance and gtfo.

Try and keep your head down through all of this. You don't want the security cams getting a good look at your face, if you can help it. And make sure your one of a kind instantly recognizable birthmark is covered. (Although it may be too late for any of that).
>>
No. 440227 ID: bf3f27

> You can't catch a stall, that big guy would have you cornered.
That's the plan. Trust me on this.

You're only stealing if you leave the store without paying for the clothes. Now, you'll need black opaque pantyhose, plaid skirt, cool jacket and cap. You have two options. Lure him and make a scandal when he peek into your stall or call your sister.
>>
No. 443218 ID: 38cd76
File 134499115854.gif - (29.30KB , 800x600 , 12imagination.gif )
443218

>You're only stealing if you leave the store without paying for the clothes. Now, you'll need black opaque pantyhose, plaid skirt, cool jacket and cap.

For some reason most of your escape plans seem to involve cross dressing by this point. You try to think of what that would be like, of the freedom of movement you could either get or lose from wearing a skirt, but you don't really have the time for that right now.

You'd like to think you don't have the know-how either, but that's a laugh. Growing up with a sister just a year younger than you really taught you a lot that you'd rather not know.
>>
No. 443219 ID: 38cd76
File 134499123975.gif - (39.43KB , 800x600 , 12stealthmode.gif )
443219

>Try and keep your head down through all of this. You don't want the security cams getting a good look at your face, if you can help it. And make sure your one of a kind instantly recognizable birthmark is covered.

Stealth mode initiated.

>Sneaking out the back, etc

Moving out!
>>
No. 443226 ID: 38cd76
File 134499167043.gif - (38.14KB , 800x600 , 12GCphonehome.gif )
443226

You have several close calls as you sneak through the store. Clothes wracks can actually be a pretty decent place to hide, though you're hindered a bit by your ill-gotten gains.

You hear a bit of conversation as you hide.

"I don't even know why we're looking for this kid. Our store doesn't even have security to page! We should just call the cops and let them deal with it."

"Weird. But hey, at least it's a break from the monotony. Or would you rather clean isles and bag groceries all day?"

"I'm just saying, something's fishy here. Most times a card gets declined, we just have them try another one, or try it again. Poor guy's just a kid!"

"Well, his parents coulda made him try and pull a fast one, or..."

"yeah yeah, just keep looking."

Weird.

You make the rest of the way to the back mostly without incident.

>call your sister.

C'mon Sheri... pick up!

If mom finds out about this, you're soooo toast.
>>
No. 443227 ID: 38cd76
File 134499181060.gif - (37.49KB , 800x600 , 12sheri.gif )
443227

You are now Sherilyn C. Bloom.

You've been at the mall all day with your friends, your mom dropped you off on her way to work with some cash, as a sort of pre-birthday present. She didn't need to, but it was super nice of her.
>>
No. 443230 ID: 38cd76
File 134499193652.gif - (24.53KB , 800x600 , 12sherisphone.gif )
443230

All of a sudden, your phone starts wringing. It was another pre-birthday present. Your dad set it up for you in your favorite colors, it's a brand new myPhone.

The caller ID doesn't have very many numbers in it yet, so the caller being unknown isn't that weird.

Still, you're hanging out with your friends, and don't know if you should really answer it right now.
>>
No. 443232 ID: d6c330

Blissfully continue to enjoy this wonderful day your horrid brother hasn't yet ruined for you and definitely won't anytime some.
>>
No. 443242 ID: bf54a8

eh, why not?
>>
No. 443276 ID: b85f8c

Answer iiiiit
>>
No. 443323 ID: 6e44d2

Answer.
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