>>818450
"Long story short, souls got mixed up, Chuck got some, I'm the rest."

Smik 2017/07/25(Tue)22:04 No. 818464 ID: e136ae
File 150104547192.jpg - (74.13KB , 640x720 , RQ_AnalBasically3.jpg )

Razzay: Bitch, please. I said I'm Razzay, the Wicked and Powerful. I'm a fuck'n WITCH, you hack amateur spell-pisser. The only reason why your ass isn't ALREADY my familiar's play toy is because I'm as GRACIOUS as I am POWERFUL. Also it could be fun to mess with the monsters.

Horny: ... if you're not gonna be using her vagina...

Razzay: GOOD POINT. So yeah... Double penetration, basically. And we get to borrow Chuck, if he's y'know... actually the fuck'n legend like he says.

Byron: Susanna, you're not actually THINKING of agreeing to do BUSINESS with these DEVIL WHORES, are you? They spit ... spit... SEMEN on innocent people for heaven's sake!

What do you do?

1. Attempt to INFLUENCE Susanna into agreeing. You may use up to 5 of your 10 IP to do so.

2. Object to Double Penetration; Horny can have Susanna's vagina after you are done with her ass.

3. Add something else to the agreement first.

4. Bunt Susanna.

5. Tell Susanna you can prove the group's ability to deliver.

6. Something else?

4, right meow.

>>818464
Yell at Byron that murder is a bigger sin than jizz spitting!

>>818464
"I CALL VAGINA TOO."

yeeeaah, go ahead and 1. Use the full 5 AP. I kind of wanna see how it interacts with this snake anyway.

>>818464
"Byron, Byron, Byron, sweetie... Murder's in the top ten list, but there isn't even a clerical ruling against being disgusting with bodily fluids - I checked."

Hey, Nem? These undead guys have been immortal static murder machines since the early 1900s; is the wolf hungry?

>>818464
4. but drag Lisa over to bunt Susanna too.

Smik 2017/07/26(Wed)15:26 No. 818637 ID: e136ae
File 150110800548.jpg - (153.48KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxSusannaBunt.jpg )

You bunt Susanna.

Susanna: Prove to me that the reverends are well and truly dead and I will grant your request.

Susanna seems less convinced and more having just given up trying to make any sense of the situation.

When you try to explain to Byron that murder is worse than jizz-spitting, Byron reminds you that as a dead person, murder really isn't all that big a deal and to just get over it. He also points out that Susanna was murdered and now she's the mayor, so really in this situation jizz spitting is much worse.

Smik 2017/07/26(Wed)15:38 No. 818639 ID: e136ae
File 150110869496.jpg - (265.88KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxSusannaNewMission.jpg )

NEW MISSION!

You need to deal with the three reverends in order to obtain SNANAL.

Who should you deal with first?

1. Pewter (currently dead, but not dead-dead)
2. Byron (currently still indignant)
3. Hale (unknown - he took off after being wounded and seeing what Razzay did to Pewter)

>>818537
>Hey, Nem? These undead guys have been immortal static murder machines since the early 1900s; is the wolf hungry?

Side note, but you can't contact Nem here. It's complicated but basically Moxy can contact you easily since she helped set up the book in the first place. Nem is a different story, and she might not even respond considering how hostile Razzay is to her.

>>818639
Ok, new plan.
Horny, we need you to fuck a hole into the block on top of the well, then suplex the revenants into it.
We'll go get Sally so she can open the tomb that's trapped countless restless dead for centuries.

We'll lock the revenants in the tomb. That miiiight let out a horde of ghosts, but we only promised to get rid of the revenants.

Or Susanna could tell us where she left their corpses and where the church graveyard was; burying them in hallowed ground is part of banishing a revenant.

Smik 2017/07/26(Wed)17:37 No. 818667 ID: e136ae
File 150111587321.jpg - (104.77KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxRazzayVeetos.jpg )

>>818648
>Horny, we need you to fuck a hole into the block on top of the well, then suplex the revenants into it.
>We'll go get Sally so she can open the tomb that's trapped countless restless dead for centuries.
>We'll lock the revenants in the tomb. That miiiight let out a horde of ghosts, but we only promised to get rid of the revenants.
>Or Susanna could tell us where she left their corpses and where the church graveyard was; burying them in hallowed ground is part of banishing a revenant.

Razzay: ... are you... fucking... stupid?

First off, what fucking block? And I don't think Horny could fuck a hole in CEMENT.

Horny: My Unusual trait isn't nearly high enough for that.

Razzay: Second, who the fuck is Sally and why would I need HER help to open a tomb? I'm a FUCKING WITCH, I'm pretty sure I can figure something out, fuckwit. THIRD, what fucking ghosts? FOURTH, I AM A FUCKING WITCH. I have a fucking ENCHANTED SHOTGUN. I could just FUCKING. SHOOT. THEM. It's just a matter of figuring what kind of AMMO I need to use.

Finally - I don't think all the reverends operate the same. If fucking BYRON was hacked we need to figure out who else is and how the rules have CHANGED in order to DEAL WITH THEM. That's why we gotta pick ONE to start with.


Susanna stares at Razzay, and then stares at you, and then glances over at Horny who just shrugs and gives her a look combining both helplessness and indifference.

Susanna: Are you all MAD?

Razzay waves her off dismissively with a "Quite fuck'n possibly". This unsurprisingly does little to comfort the mayor.

Choose one of the reverends to deal with first.
1. Pewter (lying out front with its saber through its head)
2. Byron (standing outside the window being indignant)
3. Hale (unknown)

>>818667
Team Fortress has taught me one thing about the Hale family: do NOT leave Mister Hale for last, he "will rip your spine out of your arse if you pick option one".

>>818667
Ignore the indignant one, kill the stabbed one.

Smik 2017/07/28(Fri)23:51 No. 819238 ID: e136ae
File 150131110983.jpg - (60.50KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxFinishPewter1.jpg )

>>818695

You decide to finish Pewter. Susanna follows you out of the office, and glances at the prone, glowing body of Lisa with a bit of surprise but says nothing.

The corpse of Pewter lies exactly where you three left it -- just a short distance from town hall, its own saber plunged into its head and bleeding a foul smelling ichor.

Razzay: So, these guys normally bleed?

Susanna is shocked.

Susanna: No!

Razzay smiles evilly and pulls out her sawed-off.

Razzay: That's 'cause YOU suck and I'm fuck'n awesome.

Susanna glares at Razzay and points out that the reverend might be down but it's not DEAD.

Razzay: Pffft, no shit Sherlock snake. I just need to figure out the right kind of AMMO for this fucker.

Razzay looks over at you.

Razzay: OK so what we do here is either fuck'n query it (scan it) and try to figure out its deal or I can try to fuck'n look through my bag of tricks and see what shit sticks.

What do you suggest?

1. Scan the corpse and try to figure out what might keep it down and if it's been hacked. You'll have to bombard it with questions to see if there are any weak points or contradicting elements just as before with Byron.

2. Have Razzay use her witchcraft knowledge to figure out a way to put it down for keeps.

Scan the @#$%er.

>>819238
Probing for unexpected answers:
What is your name?
What animal are you?
What is your job?
How do you deal with sinners?
How did you die?

Checking for contamination with specific townsfolk:
Who do you usually see on your morning jog?
What would you do to protect your daughter?
What subjects are you teaching the children?
What do you get delivered from the bakery?

Smik 2017/07/29(Sat)19:42 No. 819416 ID: e136ae
File 150138253216.jpg - (93.70KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxFinishPewter2.jpg )

>Probing for unexpected answers:
>What is your name?
Reverend Pewter.

>What animal are you?
Canine.

>What is your job?
Reverend and punisher of the wicked.

>How do you deal with sinners?
Depends on:
1. Sinner Value
2. Opportunity

>How did you die?
Slain by Susanna.Stark.

>Checking for contamination with specific townsfolk:
>Who do you usually see on your morning jog?
Error: No event found.

>What would you do to protect your daughter?
Error: No event found.

>What subjects are you teaching the children?
Error: No event found.

What do you get delivered from the bakery?
Error: No event found.


Razzay: Doesn't look like this one's hacked. Looks like choosing fuck'n "sinners" is more than just random chance. Might get better answers for why they're fuck'n still around and how they come back. I can tell you why it's fucking bleeding though: there's no 'code' to tell it how to react to my magical fuck'n sawed off. Like, at all. Nothing in Coxwette, which means they basically gotta go by my rules. Which is why the fucker is HURT and why it's bleeding, but not DEAD. So there's something in Coxwette that dictates how these fuckers can DIE -- and it's not damage. Typical fuck'n bitch-ass immortal unseelie-types though -- the moment shit actually hurts they fuck'n wuss out. Remind me to take you vampire hunting sometime, it's hilarious. Speaking of. Maybe we should take a peak at the Honorable Mayor Fuck-up?

Susanna: WHAT?

Razzay: I mean, we could see if she's into anal as much as I am. If she's into anal, basically then fuck -- we gotta up the ante to make it more fun.

What do you suggest now?

1. Maybe we should query Coxwette instead? Find out rules on death?
2. Query the Reverend some more.
3. Query Susanna.

>>819416
Querying the town seems more productive, but I mean hey, snanal is a quick check.

Coxwette:
Can anyone actually die in this town?
Does time pass here?
How did Marcie come back?
How did the reverends come back?
How can the reverends be killed permanently?
What power maintains this town in its static state?

Smik 2017/08/02(Wed)18:06 No. 820132 ID: e136ae
File 150172241307.jpg - (96.79KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxFinishPewter4.jpg )

>>819494
>Querying the town seems more productive, but I mean hey, snanal is a quick check.

"Susanna enjoys anal very much."

Susanna doesn't hear the answer, but she does hear the query and she gives you all an incredulous look. When Razzay hears the answer she winks at Susanna and gives her finger-guns.

Razzay: You are SO getting plowed up the ass later. PLOWED. Like if Luner pops out too early I'll find a strap-on and step in.

Susanna just *stares* at Razzay.

>Coxwette:
>Can anyone actually die in this town?
By 'die' as in permanent mental and physical destruction, no it is not possible.

>Does time pass here?
Time passes and then repeats.

>How did Marcie come back?
Recovered from memory.

>How did the reverends come back?
Recovered from memory.

>How can the reverends be killed permanently?
There is currently no destructor method designated for the reverends.

>What power maintains this town in its static state?
Love.

At that last answer, Razzay's ears twitch.

Razzay: ... well, that's interesting. Using love is really fuck'n risky. It's fuck'n powerful but it's also really fucking temperamental. Like, this is up my alley. This all goes back to my fucking research on the panties of immortality. Hang on.
>Cowette Query: Stability of the memories of the people living in town, excluding Susanna.

Result: The general town population uses self-sustaining memory model. Other memories are transferred to Coxwette for use as living resources.

Razzay: Fuck'n knew it. Fuck'n Curse of the Immortal.

Everyone stares at her.

Razzay: It was something I was work'n on. The fuck'n Curse of the Immortal basically means that any memories that aren't actively used or required as part of other important memories get used to power whatever spells are used to keep your physical form fuck'n static. It means everyone here -- except probably fuck'n Susanna which is why I excluded her in my query -- forgets shit they don't think is important or isn't tied to something that is really quickly. Coxwette is probably breaking the memories down and fuck'n using them to keep everyone's bodies static -- but not so static that they notice. Immortality is fucking tricky -- if you're TOO static you can't remember or learn shit after you become immortal, and if you regen too much you fuck'n age in reverse. There's a mess of tricks you can use if you don't mind stay'n in the same fuck'n place FOREVER. And that's just what this place is doing.

Please submit new queries or suggest "Quit" to end queries for now.

>>820132
What if we got everyone blackout drunk so they don't remember shit in the morning

>>820132
It looks like it prioritizes older memories and the outside world for elimination. Nobody notices that people outside the town's instance never respond, and people are oblivious to WHAM factors even existing.

Query: How old has the town been static?
Query: Who made the town static?

>>820136
>What if we got everyone blackout drunk so they don't remember shit in the morning

Coxwette would consume all those memories.

>Query: How old has the town been static?

Since its establishment.

>Query: Who made the town static?
Nelson Plath.

>>820149
How many years have passed on the outside since the town became static? On the inside?
What animates the reverends?
Where is Nelson Plath?
If people cannot die, how and why are there ghosts?
If Nelson Plath made the town static, and nobody can die in town, how is it that he stayed dead?
Who is Harold Pal?
How did Cletus leave?


Several of those should give us useful entry points.

WHO'S love is powering this?
What happens if all the memories about a still-living person get consumed?
What happens to the people who try to leave town?
If death is out, could someone be deleted from town?

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)12:18 No. 820272 ID: e136ae
File 150178788931.jpg - (111.13KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis1.jpg )

>How many years have passed on the outside since the town became static? On the inside?

Approximately 300 years; even Coxwette has difficulty keeping track of time.

>What animates the reverends?
The same that keeps the town static.

>Where is Nelson Plath?
Nelson Plath's physical form is attached to the Blue Couch. A spiritual copy sleeps in storage.

>If people cannot die, how and why are there ghosts?
Permanent separation of mind, spirit and body is not possible. Temporary separation is.

>If Nelson Plath made the town static, and nobody can die in town, how is it that he stayed dead?
Nelson Plath was the administrator and operator but his physical destruction was total enough to also destroy his mental template and thus he only has an inactive spiritual copy recorded in memory.

>Who is Harold Pal?
Harold Pal is a Moderator of Coxwette.

>How did Cletus leave?
Two separate conditions were met.
1. Cletus found true love, which placed him in a separate class than most of Coxwette.
2. Cletus promised to return.

>WHO'S love is powering this?
Susanna is the primary source, although positive family relations in Coxwette also generate energy.

>What happens if all the memories about a still-living person get consumed?
Error handling prevents this. Coxwette has been programmed to terminate over this situation. Additionally, Coxwette will not consume all memories as many memories are not viable.

>What happens to the people who try to leave town?
Visitors are evaluated with one of the following results:
1. If a visitor possesses desirable skills/dreams/memories/outside knowledge then a recursive border prevents them from leaving. When they stay in town, housing is modified, town coding is updated based on the visitor's knowledge. Carnal Speech is applied to modify the resident's memories.
2. If a visitor has desirable connections to the external world but is otherwise undesirable, then certain elements are copied based on available resources and the visitor is allowed to leave.
3. If a visitor has no desirable elements then nothing is retained and the visitor is allowed to leave.

Visitors who are class 1 but refuse to remain in town will be allowed to wander until they decide to remain in town. Error handling is used to prevent loss.

>If death is out, could someone be deleted from town?
Destructor methods were prototyped but never completed.

Razzay "hmmms" at this new information.

Razzay: Sounds like Nelson didn't get a chance to finish this fuck'n project. Sounds similar to Dungeon code, honestly.

Susanna gives Razzay a curious look.

Razzay: Dungeon code. Fuck'n self-sustaining world. Needs fresh people on the regular but not so many that they could take over. Happens to Fae if they live too long - their world stops fuck'n listening to them and only cares about sustaining itself. People eventually become fuck'n part of it. Pantheon are fuck'n worse though, they live that shit.

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)13:18 No. 820273 ID: e136ae
File 150179153661.jpg - (171.63KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis2.jpg )

Susanna: Coxwette is NOT a DUNGEON!

Razzay: Fuck'n hush, the adults are talking.

She turns to you.

Razzay: Usually Dungeons happen because the part that keeps body, mind and soul together fuck'n gets too big for its britches and fuck'n outgrows everything. Dungeons happen when whoever was in charge gets fuck'n usurped by their own survival instinct. Coxwette is different, 'cause in this case the person in charge got fuck'n KILLED but he set up the world so it could fuck'n run WITHOUT him. Which is a bit fuck'n nuts.

Susanna: Nelson Plath was brilliant but insane.

Razzay: If he was more fuck'n brilliant he would have put a fail-safe in first.

Susanna: Like WHAT?!

Razzay: Pft, it's his own fuck'n turf. He could've put in guards, back-doors, illusions, lots of shit. Maybe he didn't know how. I mean, coding the fuck'n town to just take ANYONE is nuts. Even dungeons are fuck'n selective with who they bring in.

Razzay makes a query about the reverends' 'owner'; the response is Susanna.

Razzay: So you're the reason why the reverends come back, Suzie.

Susanna: WHAT?!

Razzay: You heard me.

Razzay makes a query about Susanna's 'classification' and then she calls out "Mirror Mirror" and fiddles with it. She looks over at you.

Razzay: Sorry but I hate fuck'n using the verbal query system, it's so slow.

You don't understand a lick of what flies across the compact's surface but Razzay seems to.

Razzay: OK, so basically these assholes keep coming back 'cause you're feeling guilty about fucking up, Suzie.

Susanna glares at Razzay.

Susanna: How ... do you even KNOW what...

Razzay interrupts her: If they had burned you like they did fuck'n Nelson, the town would have died out a long time ago. Instead, you came back cursed. All that hate and all that guilt... fuck'n religious nuts like the reverends LIVE that shit. You loved Nelson, he died, you felt responsible. All the shit they do is just you reliving your death 'cause you fuck'n felt you DESERVED it. The reverends are your own fuck'n memories brought back with you from death. That's why it's them and nobody else. And that's why they don't fuck'n die -- because they're bound to you.

There is a long moment of silence.

Is there anything preventing Nelson from being restored from copy?
Which is to say, anything that a skilled and powerful witch couldn't accomplish?

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)13:39 No. 820275 ID: e136ae
File 150179278486.jpg - (96.42KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis3.jpg )

Susanna: It can't be true.

Razzay: 'Fraid it is, Suzie.

Susanna: It would mean I'm... I'm responsible for...

Razzay: THAT is fuck'n CURSE, Susanna. It fuck'n repeats shit. Tell me, you blame yourself every time someone dies by one of these things?

Another long silence. Susanna swallows once, then nods.

Razzay: Just like you blamed yourself for Nelson?

She nods again.

Razzay: Even though...

Susanna: The reverends were the ones that did the killing.

Razzay: Would it help to know that it wasn't really YOU you? Really it's more... kinda like... the memory itself repeating?

Razzay tries to give her a sympathetic look but she's out of practice and it doesn't work.

Susanna: So I have to die.

Razzay looks shocked as she realizes the implications of the information she's presented.

Razzay: WHAT? NO! FUCK! NO! No. No, that wouldn't do SHIT except ... maybe kill the town.

Susanna: They could go free.

Razzay: Fuck'n maybe EVENTUALLY and I haven't even looked into if fuck'n Nelson did some sort of safeguard to keep things going if the town ran low on love. Also, FUCK NO because... the fucking reverends are STILL AROUND in some form. Fuck, if anything suicide might just empower the fucking Curse into thinking it was fuck'n RIGHT. NO.

Razzay grabs Susanna firmly.

Razzay: Say it with me, SUICIDE IS BAD.

Susanna stares at her.

Razzay: SUICIDE IS BAD.

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)13:55 No. 820276 ID: e136ae
File 150179371308.jpg - (140.41KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis4.jpg )

Alarmed, Razzay uses CARNAL SPEECH.

Razzay: FOR FUCk'S SAKE! DON'T...

Susanna smiles at her at last.

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)14:03 No. 820279 ID: e136ae
File 150179418282.jpg - (140.96KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis5.jpg )

Razzay: ... you could have just asked me.

Susanna: I'm sorry, I thought you were a powerful, all-knowing witch?

Razzay: Fucking...

Susanna: I just wanted to be sure you were being genuine. Suicide seems to scare you.

>Is there anything preventing Nelson from being restored from copy?
>Which is to say, anything that a skilled and powerful witch couldn't accomplish?

Razzay: Maybe? His fuck'n code is a mess and I don't know him that well.

Smik 2017/08/03(Thu)15:04 No. 820295 ID: e136ae
File 150179789295.jpg - (124.50KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis6.jpg )

Susanna: You certainly have some interesting reasons for coming here.

Razzay: Keep anything you learned to your fucking self, Suzie.

Susanna: As you wish...

Razzay: So for...

Susanna: Raspberry.

Razzay flinches.

Razzay: For fucking putting down the reverends that haven't been hacked, these are the options I can think of:

Fun Things to Try:

1. Fire. If they're derived from Susanna then they should burn like her too. Of course, as they're her empowered memories of guilt they might still come back.

2. Forgiveness. If Susanna can forgive them, she might be able to forgive herself and they should cease to be... or at least not be able to revive.

3. Deletion. Things are probably stored in the catacombs.

4. Ammo modification. Charlie seems to make them kill themselves, perhaps there's an ammo type that will put them down for good?

5. Something else?

>>820295
How about you and Susanna work to bring back Nelson and let him deal with it?
Why? Well, take your pick:
*It's his world.
*It's easier to get over guilt when you reverse the cause
*It would solve some pretty major social problems in town
*We have a master witch who is an Outside Context and a competent witch who knew him perfectly well
*I want to see where this goes

Smik 2017/08/20(Sun)16:39 No. 824006 ID: e136ae
File 150327238957.jpg - (124.15KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAnalysis7.jpg )

>>820326
Razzay: Furball's gotta point. Why don't we just fucking bring back Nelson and let him deal with this shit?

Susanna: For a 'wicked and powerful' witch you certainly have no idea what you're asking. We NEED Coxwette Blue Agate, and even then there's no guarantee that...

Razzay: Fucking yeah, yeah. If we don't use the fucking blue shit then we break the rules and Harold Pal will kick my ass out and you're on your fucking own. Except we don't NEED the agate if I can get down to the catacombs...

Susanna: That's not possible, I had the well sealed.

Razzay: FUCKWIT!

Susanna: It was for the good of Coxwette!

Razzay: Yeah, sealed your monsters up right fucking good didn't it!?

Susanna and Razzay glare at each other for a few moments in silence. They are distracted momentarily when Horny Futa begins to masturbate.

Horny: I have a horniness penalty to take care of.

Susanna sighs and turns to Razzay: Chuck mentioned he knew where he could find some Blue Agate. We will need more than a small piece in order to attempt to revive Nelson Plath, and I am afraid he might still be angry at me. Find Chuck or the Blue Agate and then maybe we can begin on your plan.

Razzay: Or I can look into how to put these things down, or cripple them. We know someone's messed with Coxwette already, and maybe there are new rules I can use to disable them. Like if they all turn into Bitchy Byron McBitcherson they'd be much easier to deal with.

What do you suggest?

1. Go with Susanna's suggestion and find Chuck first.
2. Go with Susanna's suggestion and find some Blue Agate.
3. Go with Razzay's suggestion and look for some other way to cripple the reverends.

>>824006
2, and bukkake every reverend we see.

Time to unleash... THE POWER OF THE BEYBLADE!

>>824006
Do what the lady with the ability to blackmail you suggests

2, overpower the reverends with sheer agatery.

Smik 2017/08/24(Thu)14:31 No. 824830 ID: e136ae
File 150361031310.jpg - (162.50KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxMission1.jpg )

>>824015

Razzay: Fine, furball. Where do we get this "Coxwette Agate" then?

You can hear Susanna shouting at Horny for spooging on the prone body of the defeated reverend. Horny defends her actions as being 'proven effective' and also something about a horniness penalty but you mostly tune it out.

Finding the agate is on you now: Where do you suggest the party go?
Additionally: Do you insist Susanna come with you? She may/may not go along with it but it's likely she might go with you just to keep an eye on you.

Suggestion 2017/08/24(Thu)14:33 No. 824831 ID: 8b2654

>>824830
"Plath house. That's the best place to look."

have we checked Sussana's ass yet? it could be tight enough to form minerals!

Leave susanna behind, go check out the well.

Plath house

Didn't the agate come from a lake? Go searching for this lake with Sus Anna.

Smik 2017/09/28(Thu)18:45 No. 833437 ID: 2474dd
File 150664954438.jpg - (115.81KB , 640x720 , EQ_CoxMission_Susass1.jpg )

>>824833
This seems to best approach for the character you've established so far. As you approach Susanna from behind, she turns and gives you an icy glare as if your thoughts had proceeded you.

Smik 2017/09/28(Thu)18:53 No. 833440 ID: 2474dd
File 150665000924.jpg - (117.13KB , 640x720 , EQ_CoxMission_Susass2.jpg )

Before she can say anything or you can react, there is a brief but extremely notable flash of carnal speech.

A tiny but familiar voice whispers:
"Scan Horny Futa".

Then all is silent again.

Susanna's expression shifts from frigid irritation to open curiosity. She looks around for the source -- as do you -- but finds nothing.

Susanna: Who was that?

Razzay: What was what?

Susanna: You didn't notice?

Razzay: You mean Loonie going for your ass? Yeah, but I didn't care.

Razzay shrugs and goes back to fiddling with her mirror.

Susanna turns to you expectantly.

What do you do?
1. Tell Susanna about the Buried One.
2. Make something up: It was _____________.
3. Ignore Susanna and tell Razzay to scan Horny Futa.
4. Something else?

>>833440
3.
Definitely 3.
If she asks why then tell her it's a super important spirits thing, and she should just do it without asking questions because you just stopped going for Snanal to tell her to do it and that is fucking Snanal.

I think it said "Ban Loonie Lucha?"

1. If we get to ask her ass twenty questions, it's fair if she gets at least one.

3. Horniness penalty might be relevant here.

Little doll wants something? Ok.
3

Razzay's Quest isn't done by a long shot, but since Spooky Date is supposed to be a Halloween themed quest and it's now Dec I want to get it out of the way first.

Smik 2018/02/03(Sat)00:01 No. 864229 ID: 2474dd
File 151764489892.jpg - (129.58KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxScanHorny.jpg )

You tell Razzay to scan Horny.

Razzay looks up from her mirror and fixes you with a look of irritation.

Razzay: What? Fuck'n why?

She snorts and then scans Horny.

Razzay: What? Look, it's part of her persona so she blends in here. There's nothing unusual about ... wait a tick...

Smik 2018/02/03(Sat)00:40 No. 864230 ID: 2474dd
File 151764722126.jpg - (163.67KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxScanHorny2.jpg )

Razzay: What the fuck?! She shouldn't HAVE a horniness penalty here. Like, not top level. It shouldn't be VISIBLE unless it's a fucking mechanic here.

Razzay inspects things more closely. Horny glances over at you.

Horny: ... what's she talking about?

Susanna looks at you.

Susanna: Yes, if you don't mind. WHAT is your gutter-mouthed friend rambling on about?

Horny: I think she's talking about my horniness penalty. But that's not unusual.

Susanna sighs and looks at you helplessly.

Susanna: WHAT are both your CHARMING friends talking about now?

Razzay interrupts.

Razzay: LISTEN SHIT-FOR-BRAINS, what I am talking about is your whole FUCKING WORLD is FUCKING HACKED. Someone has fucking BEEN HERE FIRST and has modified fucking EVERYTHING so that Horny and I can work with it.

You can hear the fear laced in her profanity and due to your bond you can sense her fear as well.

Razzay: Also... Horny's code might be viral.

Horny: No I'm not I'm CLEAN!

Razzay: I looked closely and her "Horniness Penalty" is capable of spreading.

You tell Razzay that you thought that perhaps it might be relevant.

Razzay: Well you're fuck'n right. But...

She closes her eyes and communicates with you mentally.

Razzay: I'm scared. OK? I'm scared all over again. Like before, I thought it was likely this place was hacked, and it could be a fuck'n honeypot just to trap me, but you said 'let's explore' so I'm exploring and now I find out that for SURE this place is hacked and it's hacked to work FOR me.

Her mental voice is trembling.

Razzay: I'm not a hacker, Luner. Whoever set this up is, and the fact that they set it up to work with me means that I've stumbled into a trap or someone likes me. NOBODY LIKES ME. Nobody's liked me for years. I don't know what to do. You're a cat.


What do you suggest? (Multiple may be chosen but the most popular argument will be your main one)

1. Remind Razzay that if nobody liked her, you wouldn't be here. Bunt.
2. Well if it's a trap, she's screwed and there's nothing she can do about it. If it's not a trap then someone's being nice to her and she's ruining it. Since there's nothing she can do about the former, she might as well play like it's the latter and not ruin it.
3. Since Horny's horniness penalty applied in Razzay's own world, maybe it exists in her world too. And since this is a copy of an existing world but is INSIDE Razzay's world in book form, maybe it works here too?
4. The cats modified an artifact for her benefit, so it makes perfect sense that this world -- found in the instructions of said book -- is also modified to her benefit. Chill the fuck out, bitch.
5. Horny is clearly already a magical girl here to help Razzay. She's already tried to help her with her Seduction stat.

3

>>864230
1

4 seems like a reasonable argument. 1 is also a good point though.

>>864230
If it were a honeypot, and someone went through all this effort to get you here... they'd have to have been in a position to manipulating you into picking up Horny earlier, and then have manipulated you into visiting this world.

Since we (Luner) are not actively engaged in a conspiracy to divert Razzy to prepared, pre-hacked worlds... I'm struggling to think how someone could have pulled that off. Bluntly, Razzy hasn't interacted with anyone else who would be in a position to have manipulated her that way. (There are some advantages to being a recluse).

Loath as I am to discount self protective paranoia, if this world was hacked before we got here, I don't think it was done specifically to target Razzy. It seems much more likely that someone hacked this world for their own purposes and we're now discovering effects of that.

I agree we should be careful, but, well, Maxim 40. "Not all good news is enemy action."

Also, 1. I think Razzy needs emotional support more immediately than she needs a strategic analysis.

Smik 2018/03/20(Tue)22:04 No. 874663 ID: 2474dd
File 152160867381.jpg - (119.38KB , 640x720 , RQ_HugRazzayReadNote.jpg )

You explain to Razzay that if nobody liked her, you wouldn't be here. You also point out that because she's been such a recluse it's not very likely that anyone hates her enough to go to the effort of creating such an elaborate trap -- not having friends is not the same as having enemies.

Horny speaks up and reminds her that she likes her too.

You move to bunt her but Razzay just grabs you and hugs you tightly. She doesn't even mind that you have a bit of a boner and it smells like beaver (literal beaver beaver. Which now that you think about it, isn't such a bad thing really. Lisa smells pretty good).

Razzay starts to calm down.

Razzay: Right. Right. Spreading code isn't ... always bad. I mean hell, that's how worlds are created. All a mix of experience, reflection, ideas, dreams, and scientific observations from different sources.

She's still breathing a little heavily. You're pretty sure she's babbling on for her own benefit now.

Razzay: I mean... Horny's not the original Horny. This isn't the original Coxwette...

Susanna: Excuse me?

Razzay: ... so it makes sense that they're all compatible. Yeah. All... the same source.

Razzay sighs.

Razzay: Sorry Luner. Maybe it HAS been too long since I really left home.

She fiddles with her mirror some more.

Razzay: OK... well... so you still wanna look for this blue agate, right? Where did you want to look again?

You can't check the Well, you don't have any equipment to break it open. You also can't check the lake for similar reasons.

A. Resume searching Susanna's ass.
B. Plath house.

WEEEELLL as convenient as it would be to continue searching the ass due to its clear proximity, at this point I do think that the Plath house it more likely to turn up a result.

>>874670
I must reluctantly agree. Snek-spelunking doesn't have good prospects for prospecting.

Smik 2018/04/10(Tue)22:56 No. 878255 ID: 2474dd
File 152342618629.jpg - (109.78KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxPlathHouse.jpg )

You inform Susanna that you're going to head to the Plath house. Susanna shrugs; she has enough to deal with and frankly the three of you are giving her a headache.

Razzay retorts that because of you three, the town should be pretty safe from the monsters considering one is now just bitching about being jizzed on and other is almost certainly not getting up any time soon.

You get some quick directions from her. The Plath house is pretty easy to find.

Razzay knocks on the door. She knocks again, and shortly afterwards it opens slowly with a creek.

A spider woman pokes her head out suspiciously.

Sophie: Yes?

Razzay: This the Plath house?

Sophie: Yes?

Razzay: Are you a spider?

Sophie: Are you a raccoon?

Razzay: Pft, I am now aren't I. Wait, you're a nurse?

Sophie: Doctor.

Razzay: ... that's... oddly cute and the fact that it's cute is kinda weird.

Sophie: Who are you? Why you here?

Razzay: I'm RAZZAY, the WICKED AND POWERFUL. A witch. This is my familiar, Luner and this is Horny Futa who is amazing at sex.

Sophie looks over at you and her eyes all widen upon realizing you're naked. She tries to close the door but it seems to stick. Razzay looks over her shoulder at you a winks as Sophie struggles with it.

Razzay: Door's not gonna close 'till I want it to. I told you, I'm a witch. We're here to get some BLUE AGATE. You know where that shit is?

Sophie looks understandably panicked that some lunatic claiming to be a witch is attempting to invade a sick person's house. You should probably suggest something to Razzay.

What do you suggest?

A. OFFER to help: Tell Sophie that Razzay can help Ramona by getting her some booze. Don't confirm/deny Razzay's witchdom.
B. Back up Razzay and appear KNOWING: Recap the events up until this point starting from Chuck's sudden arrival until now. This should bring Razzay up to speed too, then ask her if she can magic up some booze.
C. Be OMINOUS by telling Sophie that you know she's slept with Chuck, about Sally's condom incident, and that Ramona needs booze now so she should behave before you have to spill some other secrets.
D. Be DIRECT and just tell Razzay to magic up some booze to help Ramona.

B.

I see a lot of options for magic-ing up booze, could we magic up a cure for withdrawal instead?

A. Being friendly and offering to help (booze or anti booze or not) seems right.

>>878255
E.
"Hey, Razzay, can you remove an addiction? Cure the withdrawal by curing the need?"

Smik 2018/04/25(Wed)20:11 No. 880742 ID: 2474dd
File 152471231895.jpg - (238.92KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxPlathHouse_NoGo.jpg )

>>878474
"Hey, Razzay, can you remove an addiction? Cure the withdrawal by curing the need?"

Razzay speaks with you telepathically.

Razzay: OK, so real talk here -- but you can't magically cure an addiction without wrecking the patient. The addiction itself fuck'n dominates the patient physically, psychologically and spiritually -- and addiction's like a fuck'n cancer, if you don't get rid of it all it comes back.

To cut the addiction out of her I'd have to fuck'n hack her HARD, and if she's just some dollar store rip-off of the original, chances are she won't survive it. Not to mention ol' Harold Pal would have a word or two with me.

It wrecks real people too. If the person's not strong enough to fight the addiction, I have to fuck'n mind-rape them to do it for them. It's as fucking bad as it sounds.

Actual fucking cancer is easier to cure magically than addiction. And before you ask -- no, cancer isn't something I can cure easily either, but at least you never have to mind-rape anyone to do it.

I know it sounds blasphemous but water-to-wine isn't actually too hard to pull off. I basically pull a Schrodinger's cat hack which Harold Pal either won't detect or shouldn't object to. I don't even need water as long as the bottle's opaque enough. I don't LIKE doing that trick because the implications scare the fuck outta me, but we kinda need it right now, right?

Otherwise I can pull a bottle out of hammer space, but it's more costly, obvious and might draw Pal's attention.

What do you suggest?

A. Offer to help: Have Razzay do her WATER-TO-WINE trick for Sophie.

B. Offer to help and risk Pal's ire: Have Razzay pull a bottle of booze out from HAMMERSPACE.

C. Be OMINOUS by telling Sophie that you know she's slept with Chuck, about Sally's condom incident, and that Ramona needs booze now so she should behave before you have to spill some other secrets.

D. Some other plan?

>>880742
Well, that's shit.

Sure, A.

Can you magic up some microbes that'll survive in Ramona's bloodstream, synthesizing enough ethanol while they're in there to fend off withdrawal but not give her any more than a mild buzz?

>>880787
Sounds like a potentially good idea maybe add them to the alcohol when you do A for easy access to the body. Their is also creating a microbe that converts the hosts starch intake into alcohol during the digestion process (these actually exist and have been documented, people have eaten nothing but bread with this condition and still ended up intoxicated).
Either way I choose option A.

How hard is it to magic up some LSD? Don't even need enough to hallucenate to knock alcohol withdrawal out.

>>880742
A then, I guess.

Smik 2018/06/18(Mon)15:27 No. 889298 ID: 2474dd
File 152936085023.jpg - (161.02KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAssPull.jpg )

>>880787
Razzay: What? Fuck. No. You don't know what you're talking about when it comes to magic.

>>880822
Razzay: Fuck NO.

Razzay glares at you, and then pushes you over, yanks up your tail and then... somehow... yanks a bottle of wine out of your ass.

You felt something but nothing like ACTUALLY removing a bottle out of your ass (that would accompany much screaming) so it's clearly more a show.

Razzay: Boom. Wine.

Sophie is surprised and astounded but her face is not of one who is impressed.

Razzay rolls her eyes and pops the top, then takes a sip.

Razzay: See? It's fine. Just don't think about where it came from.

She hands the bottle to Sophie, who suspiciously takes a sniff and then a small sip.

Sophie: ... Yes, is wine. Wait here.

Smik 2018/06/18(Mon)15:40 No. 889305 ID: 2474dd
File 152936163278.jpg - (99.42KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxAWildRamonaAppears.jpg )

Razzay taps her foot impatiently. Eventually Ramona emerges, holding a glass of wine.

Ramona: I don't mean to be rude, but who and what are you and why do you want BLUE AGATE?

Razzay huffs.

Razzay: I AM GUYBRUSH THREEPWOOD, A MIGHTY PIRATE!!

Ramona stares at her.

Razzay: I feel like him right now with all the fucking intros I've been doing. Seriously, I'm Razzay the Wicked and Powerful. I'm a witch. I fuck up monsters with a feline familiar who is sometimes awesome and sometimes stupid as shit. This is Horny, the Wickedly Sexy-Talented Futa. We are here to ... well...

Razzay turns to you and speaks to you via spirit channel.

Razzay: I wonder if I'm out of my fucking mind asking you, but what SHOULD we tell her?

A. Tell her you need the BLUE AGATE to kill the reverends once and for all.
B. Tell her you need the BLUE AGATE to revive NELSON PLATH and fix Coxwette.
C. Tell her you sort of need BLUE AGATE but really need to find Chuck.
D. Tell her you've changed your mind and are here for sexy times.

>>889305
B.

>>889305
All of the above!

A or C.

>>889305
C

Smik 2018/08/11(Sat)23:26 No. 896842 ID: 2474dd
File 153405520849.jpg - (164.99KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxNeedChuck.jpg )

Razzay: OK well we sort of need the Blue Agate because your fuck-up mayor might have some sort of way to revive Nelson Plath and have him fix his shit... but really we need to find Chuck.

Smik 2018/08/12(Sun)01:16 No. 896846 ID: 2474dd
File 153406176045.jpg - (75.29KB , 640x720 , RQ_CoxRamonaNotImpressed.jpg )

Ramona is not very impressed. She fixes the lot of you with a very critical eye.

Ramona: Chuck's past isn't completely unknown to me but I'm pretty sure he would have mentioned meeting anyone as odd as you three.

Razzay: Well it's not like he actually knows any of us, we wanna make him a proposition.

Ramona: I don't think Chuck would be interested.

Razzay: Yeah well... why don't you let him make that decision?

Ramona thinks for a moment.

Ramona: Well if you're very keen on seeing him, I'm afraid you're going to have to find your way to Davey's Farm. He went there to ask Davey for help for me.

Razzay sighs.

Razzay: Well you're WELCOME for the fuck'n wine then.

She glances at you.

What do you think, Furball? Should we go after Chuck or just wait for him to come to us?

A. Go after Chuck.
B. Wait for Chuck here.
C. Something else?

Smik 2018/09/20(Thu)19:27 No. 902567 ID: 2474dd
File 153749682637.gif - (217.69KB , 640x720 , CoxDestablize.gif )

Razzay freezes in her tracks.

Razzy: Did you feel that?

You... did feel a little something. It was like a lapse in concentration. Things seem to jump.

Horny: What happened?

Razzay closes her eyes. She's reading code.

Razzy: Snanal happened.

"No it hasn't, not until we..."

Razzy interrupts you: No, in the REAL Coxwette. This place is destabilizing.

"Chuck actually got snanal in Coxwette? So this place is what, crashing? I'm not sure which is more unbelievable, Chuck actually getting snanal or his getting snanal is making fake Coxwette crash,"

You sure it isnt going to just toss you into limbo till it validates itself with the master timeline and then reinsert you?

>>902567
So can we stabilize this place, or do we run for our lives now?

Do we need to sync up the universe by hurrying up and making snanal happen here before it's too late?

>>902707
It might be more of an automated thingy where the copy just overwrites the entirety of the world with the original and then reinserts our guys. Everyone native to this copy will probably lose their memories and we will have to start over in this world.

Smik 2018/10/02(Tue)12:41 No. 904522 ID: 2474dd
File 153850928024.jpg - (168.81KB , 640x720 , CoxDestabilize2.jpg )

Razzay doesn't explain -- she just barks some orders for you and Horny to follow her back to the Mayor's office.

Once there, she bursts through the door pulls a still naked and relaxed Lisa to her feet.

Razzay: C'mon Lisa move your fuck'n ass!

Lisa: Wha? Why?!

Razzay: No time to explain! I can save ONE person here and I choose you!

Lisa begins to object as Razzay pulls her to her feet and begins to drag her towards the door. She makes poor progress until Horny gives her a good push from behind.

Despite her urgency, you're as confused as Lisa -- you're not aware of much cracking in the world other than Razzay's brief flicker. Maybe she's more sensitive to things that you are? Regardless, you all leave by the door...

Smik 2018/10/02(Tue)13:12 No. 904528 ID: 2474dd
File 153851114617.jpg - (214.29KB , 640x720 , LisaArrives.jpg )

And back into Razzay's World.

You experience a sickening sense of vertigo as you shift from your bipedal form back into your cat body.

Lisa has changed. She's less a beaveress and more... beaver-inspired? Still, the scent of vanilla wafts through the air as she looks about in a panic.

Lisa: What's going on? What happened here!?

Something else dawns on her.

Lisa: Why aren't you a raccoon? Why aren't you a goat?

Something else dawns on her again as she glances at you.

Lisa: Oh God what did I just fuck?

She looks down at herself.

Lisa: Oh God, what am I?!

Razzay strokes Lisa's hair and the beaver-girl becomes quiet and still.

Razzay: Soooooo..... yeah. Lisa is kinda a mess right now. She's worked with Susie enough to know magic exists, but not to the extend of crossroads and witches and shit and since that version of Coxwette crashed she doesn't have much of a way to adapt either.

"So... what's with Lisa now? Can't we just go back and fix her?"

Razzay shakes her head.

Razzay: That version of Coxwette is GONE. Yeah, it could be fixed... but you'd need a really good hacker and writer to do the job. And this isn't the real Lisa. She's a great simulation but this Lisa is like, someone on the outside looking at her. There's lots of bits missing from her.

Horny ponders this.

Horny: So ... am I a fake version of Horny Futa?

Razzay cringes.

Razzay: ... sort of? But you're really adaptable so now you're basically your own person? You're better off than the original Horny Futa, her world is suspended if I'm reading this all correctly from my book.

Horny shrugs.

Horny: Eh, whatever.

Razzay looks back at the now frozen Lisa.

Razzay: Anyhow, this version of Lisa isn't as adaptable. I'm going to have to hack her a little. If I fuck with her character too much she could crash just like the rest of Not-Coxwette. But a little code insert from one of us should do the job.

"Code insert?" you ask. "Are we in the Matrix now?"

Razzay: Sorta? Look furball, basically what I'm doing here is ... fleshing out this parody of Lisa. After awhile she'll basically adapt and become her own person.

"wat"

Razzay: She's like Pinocchio, we just need some finishing touches so she can be a real girl. I need to either give her a bit of Horny or a bit of myself and she'll be good to go. If I give her some of Horny she'll probably give less fucks and... I dunno, fuck'n have that SEXUAL system? If I give her some of me, she'll be more like those nerdy witch girls I used to fuck back in college. Both should keep her stable.

What do you suggest?

A. Give her some of Horny Futa.
B. Give her some of Razzay.
C. Something else?

I'd say ask her opinion, but that would only apply if she remembers what reality looks like.

B.

>Horny: So ... am I a fake version of Horny Futa?
If we go with the Narnia onion of realness model, we're all fake versions of some realer truth!

>What do you suggest?
B, I think. Nerdy seems more true to who she is than gives-no-fucks, and pragmatically, we could probably use another person with witchy tendencies for this adventure.

Adding some of us just seems a bad idea. Either that would be bad for her mental health, or we'd just turn her into a protagonist, which would just get messy when we already have one.

>>904528

Oh jfc, kill it with fire!!

---

Ahem, anyway, i say we put in a requisition for a Nem insert.

C: Control+V the code you'd need from someone who was basically in the real Lisa's shoes. (IE: a secretarial type who worked for someone a bit mental)

Namely: Holly from Fen quest.

>>904528
B would be better.

Smik 2018/11/17(Sat)00:23 No. 910971 ID: 2474dd
File 154244298182.jpg - (257.42KB , 640x720 , RQ_CreatingLisa1.jpg )

>>906285
>Ahem, anyway, i say we put in a requisition for a Nem insert.

Razzay: Nem? NEM?! There's no fucking way I'm going to put that cunt of a cunt into Lisa. She's going to be my fucking Sailor Scout.

Smik 2018/11/17(Sat)00:36 No. 910974 ID: 2474dd
File 154244379533.jpg - (255.79KB , 640x720 , RQ_CreatingLisa2.jpg )

Razzay: ... Sailor Scout. Lisa reminds me a bit of Sailor Mercury. I could pretty easily mix up a reasonable Sailor Mercury Lisa, with a bit of my memories of the chubby nerd girls I used to bang in college. I'd love to have a chubby Sailor Mercury. I love Sailor Moon but all the same face/same body wore on me. Chubby girls are soft n' cuddly.

Shoot, if that's an option, sure. Didn't know you could be that specific about applying bits of you to her code. That should make things easier down the road when we are actually doing the sailor scout thing, right?

I haven't seen sailor moon since I was ten or so and it was the heavily edited americanized version, and all I really remember of Mercury's personality is "NERD" (and also "blue" and "bubbles" but those were visual themes).

I was just saying before that nerdy fits her personality better so that will probably work.

Smik 2019/01/08(Tue)13:35 No. 916801 ID: 8d26c4
File 154698334477.jpg - (102.59KB , 640x720 , RQ_GeneralChatter.jpg )

Lisa: I'm so confused right now.

Razzay: Eh, it could be worse. You could be arguing with your own inner spirits in public, you could have gotten random jizz in your face, or you could have a horniness penalty.

Lisa: What?

Razzay: You'll probably see soon enough.

Lisa looks at you.

Lisa: Did I fuck a cat?

Razzay: He's not a normal cat.

Lisa: Did I let a cat finish inside me?

Razzay: He's a magical witch's cat.

Horny: I also got to finish inside you.

Lisa: Oh God, please don't let me be pregnant.

Razzay: Oh, you'll be fine. Probably. I mean, that was in Fake Coxwette, now you're in my world, you're probably fine. Like, I'm 95% sure it can't take due to being really fuck'n different species. So anyway, I want you to be my Sailor Mercury.

Lisa: I... what?

Razzay: I'm ... trying a career change from witch to magical girl, basically. Horny Futa here is either gonna be Sailor Venus or Tuxedo Mask, and I want you to be my Sailor Mercury.

Lisa looks confused, and you get the feeling she's just trying to sort out her new implanted memories.

Lisa: Aren't I a little too... big... to be a Sailor Scout?

Razzay: Fuck'n no. Look, just because Sailor Moon's all same-body-same-face doesn't mean my Scouts have to put up with that bullshit. I like you, and you won't hear me doing some uppity bitch snipe comments about your body like Susie does.

Lisa: ... but you're just as thin and beautiful.

Razzay: Yeah but I'm fuck'n smart enough to recognize thicc and beautiful, too.

Lisa: Is that a thing now?

Razzay: I'll introduce you to the fuck'n Internet.

Razzay looks over at you.

Razzay: OK Furball, you got any ideas for my other Scouts?

Open for the time being, but if you're at a loss you can ask for OPTIONS.

Main Character (Kobble Saga, Pudding)
Creep (Eadoo Quest, FlynnMerk)
A random Cyborg with Enhance Knockers (Rollback)

Any Hoodlum character from Hoodie quest.

Btw, Lisa could work out if she feels that strongly about it.

>>916859
(Yes...well, if Lisa felt strongly about it she wouldn't be Lisa, would she?)

>>916864
(but she isnt Lisa-Lisa, she is pirated-Lisa, plus she could change if she wanted to, idk i think it is more important that we just voice that the option is there, not push her one way or the other.)