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Bob 2011/10/18(Tue)19:30 No. 18351 ID: 84b792

Posting this thread got me a three day ban on /tg/ for 'off topic posting', even after five people responded with writefaggotry. I regret nothing but the current state of /tg/:

I want to be an Eldar warrior woman's little Mon Keigh plaything.:3

Here's the brief writefaggotry before I got banned:

Dear Abby,

Imperial Guardsman No. 654^58943 here, formerly Prisoner No. 654^46950.

My Comissar accused me of heresy when I suggested we refrain from destroying an Eldar broad's spirit rock so as to not spur them into a berserk jihad retaliation. That's not my problem (I outdrew him and flashfried his cerebellum).

My problem is that the little Eldar girl seems to have...God, I don't know how these ear people work. Imprinted? Is that the word? Look, bottom line is that I've got an Eldar kid attached to me at the midsection now, and she's got her little xeno arms and legs all locked around my waist and she's got her heels crossed and everything. I know what you're about to suggest, but apparently the earliens aren't ticklish, so that's a no go.

Anyway so my question is if I should cook off my lasgun and hope the bolter broads can't see through the mushroom cloud, or just take my chances with the grenades I scavenged off Comissar Nazi or whatever the dude's name was?

Sincerely,

New Hellgun owner

So, like a male human, leashed and naked, being forced to sit at his mistress' feet obediently while she chats with her eldar girlfriends about how hung you are compared to male eldar. Her girlfriends can't help but take peeks under the table at you as you are the animal in question, and giggling they agree and point out that you look like you're getting a little excited. At this point your mistress steps on your semihard cock with her high heels as punishment for being dirty and disgusting during tea time.
>> Anonymous 10/18/11(Tue)21:46 No.16670197
>>16670072

I SAID NOT DARK ELDAR

That's sort of what like I'd enjoy, but I mean more like a...Semi tsuntsun Eldar warrioress that subdues a particularly battleimpressive guardsman and takes him back to her hive world, and keeps him in her apartment and proselatyzes to him all the time about the superiority of Eldar over the Mon Keigh while trying to keep a grip on herself and that sort of crazy glint in her eye, before getting swept up in the moment, pushing him down on her bed and raping him and has the biggest orgasm of her millenial life.

I'm not sure what the morning after would be like though.