U WOT M8

Apollo 2016/01/18(Mon)03:22 No. 694975 ID: defceb
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I-I don't believe it! Those suggestors actually discovered my secret plots!? They're catching onto me!

I need a plan, and fast!

[1] Panic and push random buttons on the computer.
[2] Call Knights Templar-Senpai for help.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________

Blame it on someone else for putting these illuminati secrets in your quests, they're not meant to be there right?

this will give us time to carry out our SECRET PLAN

we dont know what it is yet, but it exists.

Push random big red buttons on the computer.

>>694975
TRIANGLE FACE

ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

[4] See if there's a leak with your reptoid agents.

2

2

Senpai save us!

Let's make this quit, RED BUTTON.

[1]. Short bouts of random behavior is the best way to obscure your final plan.

4: ASsemble the Knights of NERF and pull the lever under the control panel to fire secret CORE WEAPON to obliterate the capital star system of Anunnaki, so that the world will unite.

>>694975
CUT YOUR HAIR
GET STUNNA SHADE GLASSES
WEAR A VISOR BACKWARDS
CHANGE FROM YOUR SWEATER INTO A ROCKIN TIEDYE MUSCLE SHIRT

NO ONE EXPECTS THE ILLUMINATI TO BE AN ILLUMI-BRAH-TI

Realize the suggestors are already here. They've been here all along!

2222222222

2

OH NO! Double chemtrail production! Fake another terrorist attack to distract the public! Make more montage parodies to make yourself seem more fake! Prep the zombie virus (just in case).

>>694973
>>694975
Stare at the suggestors as if plotting something. Slowly let out a maniacal laugh, as if your plan is working right now.
But the catch is that you don't have one, and you'll probably let out the wrong kinda laugh - which is exactly the plan. You see, you want to make them think you're faking having a laugh to mask a panic attack because you have no plot, but they're wrong! You have a plot! A plot to make them believe you have no plot!

1. Go nuts.

(2)

[4] We should destroy Apollo. If he didn't keep telling suggestors there were signs of your plot inside his quests then they would never have become paranoid enough to find them.

2 man

>>694975

Add more meta! Metaquest about people catching on, then Metaquest about metaquest about people catching on, then meta to infinitîÐ☺Õµþ!

suggestor enountered a critical error ans has to be shut down.

>>695143

As if there could be such a thing as too much meta! This post is clearly an illuminate plot to make us shy away from looking into the greater illuminati metaplot.

The 2, the whole 2, and nothing but the 2.

Apollo 2016/01/20(Wed)00:20 No. 695772 ID: defceb
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>CUT YOUR HAIR
>GET STUNNA SHADE GLASSES
>WEAR A VISOR BACKWARDS
>CHANGE FROM YOUR SWEATER INTO A ROCKIN TIEDYE MUSCLE SHIRT

>NO ONE EXPECTS THE ILLUMINATI TO BE AN ILLUMI-BRAH-TI

I try!

I look like a dork!

>OH NO! Double chemtrail production!
Done! Chemtrails everywhere!
>Fake another terrorist attack to distract the public!
Also done! The public is distracted!
>Make more montage parodies to make yourself seem more fake!
YouTube is now 120% MLG! Airhorns everywhere! Doritos rain from the sky!
>Prep the zombie virus (just in case).
Way ahead of you!

>2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2
>Knights-Templar-senpai
Knights Templar…? I can’t! They’re SO DAMN COOL. Plus I have a huge crush on them and that is EMBARRASSING.

[1] Suck it up and call them like a WIMP
[2] Suck it up and call them like a COOL KID
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________

>>695772
>4: just go join illuminati bot and co for some buttfuckin', cmon

>>695773

Better push that button then. You know what's cool? Nuclear armageddon.

>>695772
NO YOU ALREADY LOOKED LIKE A DORK, NOW YOU ARE STYLIN' AND PROFILIN'
PROFILIN' THE ENEMIES OF THE STATE

PICK UP THAT PHONE AND SMASH YOUR FIST INTO THE KEYBUTTONS, CALL THOSE HUNKY SPANISH CONQUISTAQUISATORS AND SET UP A SPECIAL RENDEVOUS TO SUPPLY AND BE SUPPLIED WITH THE DICK

3. If your thermonuclear war can't fix a problem, you haven't used enough.

Knights Templar-senpai might be really cool (and hot) but you're the #1 conspiracy in America! If you believe in yourself you can be just as cool as them! So give 'em a [2], and maybe ask them out on a date once this whole thing blows over.

Call them like a bitch.

>>695772
confidence is key.
Suck it up and call them like an ALPHA
"ay bby u wan sum fuk"

2. (1).

Push the big red button. The beautiful, candy-colored button. The juicy, mouth-watering irresistible button!

doooooooon't blow up the world

Press the kitty lazer button!

illuminati-uke templar-seme OTP it's happening do it

Apollo 2016/01/31(Sun)17:01 No. 698649 ID: defceb
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I ring them up! I can do this! I channel all my suave conspiracy charm and say "ay bb u wan sum fuk"

Knights Templar-senpai immediately kicks down my front door. How did they even find that!?

"ILLUMINATI-KUN IF THIS IS ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR PRANKS I'M GOING TO MAKE AN EIGHTH MAJOR CRUSADE OUT OF YOUR ASS."

They noticed me!! AAAAHHHH!

[1] Tell them about those scary tgchan suggestors and how they ship everything.
[2] Invite the lizardmen and make it a threesome
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________

>>698649
Quick! Pretend it's a prank and have your ass ravaged!

>>698649
1. But also try to flirt. Unsuccessfully.

1.

THEY'RE SHIPPING THEM! AND THEN THEY'RE GOING TO SHIP US!! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOODno offense intended i know you're a man of god and all

Two.

1212121212

1. But also try to flirt. Successfully.

But Illuminati-kun, you ARE the lizardmen.

Push the big red button that invites the lizardmen over to watch the world burn in nuclear hellfire.

Lizardmen? You didn't tell me there could be Lizardmen. [2] We need everyone on this. Think, if the tgchanners can find you they could find all the conspiracies. Don't call the alien overlords though, those guys are a pain in the ass.

Apollo 2016/02/02(Tue)13:05 No. 698724 ID: defceb
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“It’s the tgchan suggestors! They’re shipping! If we don’t act soon they’ll ship US!!!”

“Did sssssomeone sssay ssshipping?”

WHY ARE THE LIZARDMEN HERE!?

[1] Invite the evil space overlords and make a party.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________

>>698724
4. smoochie templar-sama

>>698725
Yes, exhibitionism in front of the lizardmen! Exhibitionism is the deepest taboo for secret people like yourselves.

[4] Realize the alien overlords are already here, they always are, and tell them to get out. This is a meeting for respectable conspiracies.

The time has come, Illuminati.
You've been preparing for this day, haven't you.
No, not the red button for project XK.
Time to unveil Project XXXK. Time to become the true ruler of the id, ego, and superego of the world. For there is only one thing with more stamina than control, more influence than power, and that needs neither secrecy nor shame!
It is time to bring unity.
It is time to begin your quest, to become,
The Illuminaughty.

jesus christ just kiss the boy!

test

Ssseduce sssnek.

Let's have a sexy ass tea party here.

>>698724
there's a snake!? What the fuck? What's next? Is Elvis gonna come out of hiding with the AYYliens and join this party too? At this rate all of our conspiracies will go down the gutter!

Apollo 2016/02/03(Wed)23:47 No. 698876 ID: defceb
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“You heard them Illuminaughty it’s smooching time!” I’m promptly tackled by Knights Templar-senpai. “It’ll be just like the fanfiction!”

Ahhh! Right in front of the lizardmen!? And now the alien overlords are watching too! I’m not into exhibitionism well okay maybe a little This is far too much for one conspiracy to handle! It’s almost like…

...almost…

...like…

...ONE OF THOSE QUESTS. OH NO. THE SUGGESTORS MUST ALREADY BE HERE. IT’S TOO LATE!!!

[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________

4: Booze, booze everywhere.

>>698876
4) no.
4) you may not.
4) you may think we are just suggesters BUT
4) you are truly under control by us
4) we know you've been thinking about nuclear hellfire
4) but I say
4) REVEAL YOURSELF TO THE WORLD

>>698876
4. Is smoochies really such a bad thing I mean come on. If you want to chase off the lookie-loos then go ahead, but you should follow your heart.

4. Have Love grant you free will, then have a 3-som with lizard and crusader lad

The button isn't what you think it is, pushing it doesn't end the world in hellfire. Pushing the button isn't the answer anymore and your reliance on it speaks only of your weakness. Trust us, it's in your best interest.

[4] Smile for the lizard man's camera.

4. Tell CERN to do the THING.

Princess tea party time bitches.

>>698876
4: Gain another vertice and become square, nobody will expect the ilerminerty to be square!
And since square = hip, make sure you get into some stretchy pants.

It's too late. There is no way out. Bow to the will of the almighty suggesters.

4. Surrender to the smooches.

Push ALL the big red buttons!

4)smooch then nuclear hellfire

I ship options 1 and 3.

4) Pomf =3 KnightsTemplar-senpai into the Big Red Button

4. Ship Illuminaughty-Kun with Apollo-sama!

Reverse the polarity of your panopticon, giving everyone in the civilized world a free show. You know you want to.

4. Push the SHINY RED BUTTON while listening to "Ode to Joy".

Apollo 2016/02/05(Fri)13:43 No. 699282 ID: defceb
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No smooches!

“Knights Templar-senpai demands smooches!”

“Senpai, no that’s the suggestors talking! They’re already influencing us! Can’t you see we’re becoming DANGEROUSLY ATTRACTIVE!?”

“Let’s reveal this to the world!”

“Not you too, Lizardmen!”

IT’S TOO LATE. THE OTHER CONSPIRACIES CAN’T HANDLE THIS KIND OF SHIPPING.

BUT YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!

[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] Push the big red button, ending the world in sexy hellfire.

Push the sexy red button and save yourself and the world from this. Alternatively, embrace things and throw an awesome princess tea party to celebrate.

>>699282
Okay, no smooches.

5) Ship the lizardmen with the button.

>>699282
you leave us no option... but to do nothing, ha! you can't stop us from doing nothing! But this will all be for naught if someone else tries to press the button...

>>699301
I WILL TAKE THE WHOLE WORLD WITH ME BEFORE I SEE THESE SMOOCHES END

4 if it comes to that

~i say fiiiire~

[5]tiem for sexy exhibitionism and shipping!

[4] If we're going to end the world in hellfire it might as well be sexy hellfire.

>>699332
YOU FOOL! IF THE WORLD ENDS, SO DO THE SMOOCHES!

ALL THE SMOOCHES!

>>699282
[◬] Push Knight Templar-san's buttons.

[63] Apply rule 63.

>>699282
seduce the red button and engage in sexy hellfire exhibitionism and shipping!

>>699282
[x] Push the big grey button resetting the universe to the status of three days ago.

>>699371

4) Lets have a tree way... on top of the button!

Apollo 2016/02/07(Sun)20:20 No. 699970 ID: defceb
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>[63] Apply rule 63

>Push the sexy red button and save yourself and the world from this
>5) Ship the lizardmen with the button.
>4 if it comes to that
>~i say fiiiire~
>[4] If we're going to end the world in hellfire it might as well be sexy hellfire.
>[◬] Push Knight Templar-san's buttons.
>seduce the red button and engage in sexy hellfire exhibitionism and shipping!
>[x] Push the big grey button resetting the universe to the status of three days ago.
>4) Lets have a tree way... on top of the button!

THAT’S IT I’M PUSHING THE BUTTON!

GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!

Apollo 2016/02/07(Sun)20:21 No. 699971 ID: defceb
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“Yeah, push me! Push me hard~”

Push it, we the suggesters of tgchan command it!

>>699972
It says do not push.
Pushing it would be... naughty. Forbidden. Kinky.

Face it, you've lost. All that's left is terms of surrender. What do you want, truly? What is your desire? We can grant it. Even if it means giving you a place in this new world where you can be without lewd.

It'd be disgusting, really, but if that's what you want...

Don't do it! The suggesters are tellin you to! It's a TG Chan trap!

...don't make us use the nuclear option.
Button-tan.

>>699972
oh no... The button from the don't press the button quest! You lived!?

1) do whatever the button says, including push it, if that is what it so desires.

>>699972
Yes. PUsh that button~

>>699970
Haha, wow, did not expect rule 63 to go through.

>>699971
You can't push the button now. That's what those no good suggestors did with the button before!

Apollo 2016/02/07(Sun)21:43 No. 699988 ID: defceb
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>oh no... The button from the don't press the button quest! You lived!?

“Yes! It’s me! I’ve thought of nothing but you lot since the day that quest ended. I love you, random tgchan suggestors, I love you more than I can bear! I… I…!!!”

Apollo 2016/02/07(Sun)21:43 No. 699989 ID: defceb
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“I want you to push me again! Damn the consequences, this is love!”

Apollo 2016/02/07(Sun)21:44 No. 699990 ID: defceb
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“True love! Now push me!!”

>>699990
Stick your dick in it.

>>699990
If we disconnect you from the electronics, we can push you as much as you want instead of once.

HUNDREDS OF TIMES. JUST IMAGINE.

>>699992
IMAGINE

Wait can we even push button? We don't have a body this time.

WAIT! The button from "Do Not Press" was on a basement! there should not be any windows here! That button is an impostor!

Tell the button to go push itself.

>>699998
maybe it was moved?

caress the buton

Forget the button we absolutely must not allow Illuminaughty-chan to get away. We must lead Knights Templar-sempai on a hilarious Scooby Doo chase after her.

Run, we must go into hiding.

Illuminati-kun, you must dash into the tombs of Egypt and go into hiding there.

>>700145
Illuminati-chan, now.

Flip the switch that ends the world in nuclear hellfire.

>>700335
noooo!

>>699990
were you plotting to escape when we were distracted, il-lu-mi-na-ti-chan? haven't you figured it out by now?

we can find all your secret plots.

you can't hi~ide

Apollo 2016/02/09(Tue)00:50 No. 700399 ID: defceb
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>WAIT! The button from "Do Not Press" was on a basement! there should not be any windows here! That button is an impostor!
“W-what!? I-I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

>Forget the button we absolutely must not allow Illuminaughty-chan to get away. We must lead Knights Templar-sempai on a hilarious Scooby Doo chase after her.
“No don’t leave! Come back! COME BAAAAAAACK!”

Apollo 2016/02/09(Tue)00:51 No. 700400 ID: defceb
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“It’s too late, suggestors! I’m already sailing off into the sunset! Next the credits will start rolling and I’ll be free! Free to plot again! The illuminati always win in the end! HA! hhahahahHAHAHAHAHAHA! MWAhgAHAAHAGSHGASDHAHAHAHA!!!!"

>>700400
Ok, bye. I guess we'll get back to shipping people and revealing your plots.

AND THE FUTURE REFUSED TO CHANGE.

>>700400
but

...you left Templar-senpai behind...

>>700400
hey. get back here.
[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.

that's what you think! we own a speed boat!

You coward, You FOOL!
You can try to run, but you willnever be able to HIDE!
We will find you. We will get you!

WE!WILL!SHIP!YOU! THERE WILL NEVER BE PEACE!!

Wait, what's stopping us suggestors from pushing the button? Hey everyone let's go push the living shit out of that sexy red button.

No Illuminati-chan!! Not the ocean that's where the dolphins can get you. Why does no one realize how evil the dolphin conspiracy is?

>>700400
What do you mean. We got plots and antics and rule 63. How is this not a win for us.

>>700400
But Nati-chan, we were inside you this whole time. You can't escape us.

>>700400

But Illuminati, my dear, after the credits... comes the stinger.

wait.. are you literally in a ship right now, Illuminaughty-chan? That was the method you chose to escape? Riding your ship into the sunset?

I think our work here is done, guys.

>>700400
>>700427
Goodbye, and thanks for the fish

Push the big red sunset, ending the quest in nuclear credits.

So, you're shipping yourself.

Apollo 2016/02/10(Wed)18:39 No. 700912 ID: defceb
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>>700718

>>700914
rip illuminati, never got laid

>>700914
but who pushed the sunset???

to be continued

>>701014
it was bb6515