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903569 No. 903569 ID: 1301e8

A Feast of Souls

[NSFW]

“Justice? They are nothing but beasts, deserving nothing but complete extermination. They cannot fathom something complex like justice, nor do they deserve any kind of mercy. The only thing they deserve is the complete extinction I’ve already given them for daring to even exist, and you will not stop it.”
-Karkan Inkfeather.

Wiki and previous threads: https://tgchan.org/wiki/First_Day_of_Harvest
Discussion thread: https://tgchan.org/kusaba/questdis/res/120031.html
676 posts omitted. Last 100 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 933598 ID: 91ee5f

I feel like a fucking idiot for not thinking of this sooner. Let’s tell Alisa that we’re a bounty hunter.

Someone in the far north put a bounty on Tertian because, several years ago, he was a serial killer that seduced people and murdered them after luring them to bed and having sex with them. You have his necklace as proof that you stopped that monster from harming anyone else.

If she asks how the necklace proves anything, since you could’ve just wrote his name on it and not killed him for easy money, tell her that your employer has a mage that will cast a spell on you that can tell if you’re lying or telling the truth.

You can’t tell her anything else because it’s classified.
>>
No. 933633 ID: 2202fb

>>933552
>>933573
It makes it sound like we are a vampire bc it sounds like a coverup. A better route would be not to mention the vampire at all.

@91ee5f
i kinda feel like you are just very against all my suggestions across the board...
Anyway, that is all.

>>
No. 933637 ID: 79eaac

>>933598
Now that actually does sound very reasonable.

Make very sure that thicczard understands that, if she wants you gone, you will follow her wish, be gone post-haste and never bother her again.

If she calms somewhat, tell her you can offer her your friend's address if she'd like to meet him on her own terms some time.
>>
No. 933639 ID: 79eaac

>>933633
Looking at all of your suggestions, I'm against nearly all of them. Nothing personal, I just disagree with them.
>>
No. 933650 ID: a9af05

>>933505
>Liar!
You'll admit that you lied about the necklace, but everything you've said about her was true! She's a wonderful person and you'd hate to leave her alone, so you wanted to try and get a date for her.

You never meant to hurt her.

Once she's calmed down, tell her about Karn.


>>933598
>Bounty hunter
Huh, that does seem more reasonable than telling her there are vampires in town.

And if she's unsure about meeting Karn, we can tell her that we've been a bounty hunter long enough to tell the difference between suspicious people and trustworthy people.

Then we ask her to give Karn a chance, you're confident that she'll have a wonderful time.
>>
No. 933655 ID: c7f906

Guys, tell her the truth, not just what sounds feasible. She's already proven to be better at finding the truth than you are at lying.
>>
No. 933671 ID: 189b8c

>>933655
Yay, a comrade!
:D

Tbh, what really was the issue to me was just how they disagreed. They would just shut me down with a "No" or "We are not doing that"(are not, rather than shouldnt) and not even give their reasoning. It was just rather frustrating to me as while I dont expect everyone to agree with me, i generally still try to give worthwhile suggestions. Anyway, i am going to drop this as i dont want to get banished to the BDAT.
>>
No. 933686 ID: a9af05

>>933655
Tell the truth and have her run to the guards? I don't think so. Telling the truth would also involve revealing Ema's real name and appearance, which would be very bad and make it that much harder to do what we came to this city to do.

>>933671
Just because people keep shutting you down, that doesn't mean that they were doing it for the sake of shutting you down. You can't take things like that personally. You've just gotta roll with the punches and accept that not everyone is going to agree with you.
>>
No. 933690 ID: 91ee5f

>>933655
Again I’d like to point out that Ema herself said that she’s not going to tell Alisa, so stop trying to force that on her!

Also, Alisa is an extremely poor choice to tell our secret to. She’s so innocent, she’ll run off and tell the guards about us. And even if they don’t believe her, Kern and Athena Mediean will believe her and then they’ll come hunt us down and kill us!

We should not tell Alisa the truth about us!
>>
No. 933693 ID: c7f906

>>933686
>>933690
I said tell the truth, not her secret. That means tell her there are vampires about, and not make shit up about being a bounty hunter which she'll imidiately call you out on and will probably try and verify later. You know, not add to the clusterfuck of lies we're trying to maintain? Revealing her true identity and undead status were never part of the equation OR my suggestion. I'm honestly struggling to believe I didn't make that understood.
>>
No. 933695 ID: 3bab33

We could tell her that when we found it and that because of how expensive these things are we actually had no intention of giving it back to a whore.

As for Kharn, we could say that in the short time we've known her we've seen how good a person she is and we want her to be happy but we're a traveler so we can't stay with her so we thought we could try hook her up with a local guy we've kind of become friends with that we thought she would like and he would like her.
Sorry if we over stepped our boundaries.

Or we could tell her the truth.
>>
No. 933706 ID: 055cbc

>>933693
Vampires are a bit of a non-sequitur though? Talking about them doesn't explain any of the stuff she is asking about, and only frightens her or makes us look crazy. As of >>933521 I agree with your goal, but not your approach there.


Telling a partial version of the truth (or even spilling all of it) results in a meandering web of improbabilities and murder. It's not going to do any better at convincing her we're legit than making up more lies. Fortunately, we don't have to tell her ANYTHING. We can simply say "sorry, I am in some dangerous shit and I don't want to get you involved" and let it go. It would be nice to do it gently, and in a way that doesn't preclude further contact with this or some other EmaSona, but I'd rather cut losses than make it worse.
>>
No. 933714 ID: c7f906

>>933706
It pretty well explains why the hooker died without having to lie and explains why we were being sparing with the truth, Which explains EXACTLY the things she's asking about. It's also a better plan than just pulling a 'need to know basis' card and hoping that changes her mind about Ema being a liar and not wanting to go see Karn, which no way approaches the goal you say you agree with.
>>
No. 933723 ID: 1301e8
File 155856211391.png - (35.55KB , 700x550 , 88.png )
933723

>She sounds like the type to take her own life after suffering through something like this. Leaving now would put her in danger.
It’s not that bad, is it? Right… you can’t leave her… not like this… not if there’s a chance she’ll… she’ll…
>Alisa is an extremely poor choice to tell our secret to. She’s so innocent, she’ll run off and tell the guards about us. And even if they don’t believe her, Kern and Athena Mediean will believe her and then they’ll come hunt us down and kill us!
Keeping it a secret would be prudent. The less that know about you, the less the chance of being found out and burned at the pyre.
>Ema is not particularly good at lying.
No shit, detective.
>Be prepared to leave. Sticking around when you aren't welcome isn't gonna help anybody.
If she still wants you to leave after you’ve tried to explain things, then you’ll leave. You must at least try to make things better.

>Tell her if she wants the truth she has to give it back to you first.
:AlisaFoS: Eh!? No! I’m not going to hand this back until I know you didn’t s-steal it!
>You'll admit that you lied about the necklace, but everything you've said about her was true! She's a wonderful person and you'd hate to leave her alone, so you wanted to try and get a date for her. You never meant to hurt her.
:AlisaFoS: S-stop t-trying to c-compliment me into d-dropping the subject!
:ElricFoS: But it’s so hard wh-
:AlisaFoS: S-stop it, p-please.
:ElricFoS: …if you insist.

>Then tell her some of the truth. First, Tertian's sister wanted to kill you.
:AlisaFoS: Eh!? What!? Why!? Wait, he h-had a sister!?
:ElricFoS: Terroza, one of the guard captains.
:AlisaFoS: Oh, that meanie… y-yeah, it w-wouldn’t s-surprise me if s-she… I’ve h-heard some terrible things about her… b-but what has t-that to do with h-her… um… b-brother?
:ElricFoS: He was working with her, being her eyes and as well as a lure.
>You fought her off, then went looking for him, and that's how you got his necklace. He was a bad man, and got the justice he deserved.
:AlisaFoS: …w-wait, a-are y-you telling me y-you… oh c-crackers, y-you MURDERED SOMEONE!?
:ElricFoS: Hmm? What? No! Tertian is still alive and… waiting to face justice. Terroza, on the other hand… she did attack me and tried to kill me…
:AlisaFoS: S-so… y-you m-mean it w-was self-defense!? S-still! Y-you killed someone! Y-you can’t just… can’t just… kill!?
:ElricFoS: As you said, self-defense. And… well…

>Let’s tell Alisa that we’re a bounty hunter.
…well, it is technically true. You are a hunter of bounties… though you get paid in food instead of coin…
:AlisaFoS: EH!? Y-YOU’RE A WHAT!?
:ElricFoS: That’s why I’m here! To hunt down dangerous individuals and monsters! Those that are a danger to people like you and need to be taken care off! Like Terroza… or those shapestealers…
:AlisaFoS: Y-you actually… w-wait… d-do you even have any proof that y-you’ve killed a monster!? Y-you can s-still just be some… some thug that attacked Terroza and s-stole that necklace!
>Show her that bit of vampire you collected, ask if she knows what it is.
:AlisaFoS: …that’s… some kind of… stinger… tail?
:ElricFoS: A tongue, actually…
:AlisaFoS: EH!? D-don’t tell me… t-that’s a vampire… but… where did y-you… how!?
:ElricFoS: Let’s just say that you shouldn’t be out alone at night around these parts, Alisa.
:AlisaFoS: But… w-why did y-you grab it’s tongue and not… um…
:ElricFoS: Well… it kind of exploded when I pierced its core so this was the biggest part that survived.
:AlisaFoS: R-right… undead and their soul cores… OH! This is why y-you wanted those books about the undead! I see! It all makes sense now!

>Make very sure that thicczard understands that, if she wants you gone, you will follow her wish, be gone post-haste and never bother her again.
:AlisaFoS: I… um… a-actually… I… wouldn’t mind if… y-you stayed for a bit longer?
:ElricFoS: I still got the whole night open if y-
:AlisaFoS: No, that’s… that’s fine. I still don’t trust you, Elric… not that much, at least.
:ElricFoS: Fair enough.
>We could say that in the short time we've known her we've seen how good a person she is and we want her to be happy but we're a traveler so we can't stay with her so we thought we could try hook her up with a local guy we've kind of become friends with that we thought she would like and he would like her.
:AlisaFoS: I don’t know… who even is this friend of yours?
:ElricFoS: His name is Karn. He's confident and a skilled fighter when he isn't being an absolute grump.
:AlisaFoS: A… fighter? And he’s a man? L-like you?
:ElricFoS: A bit like me, yeah. But if you want to meet him on your own terms, you can always find him in his training hall down at… err… whatever that place is called?
:AlisaFoS: Training hall? W-wait, you mean t-t-t-the weapon master!?
:ElricFoS: That’s the one, yeah.
:AlisaFoS: Oh, I u-used to w-watch him t-train in t-the summer when he w-wouldn’t wear a s-shirt and… and… err… I mean, isn’t he… y-you know… h-he’s always surrounded by woman but h-he never… err…
:ElricFoS: He’s into women. He just isn’t into women who are trying to prove themselves stronger than him or something similar.
:AlisaFoS: Oh… err… t-then… I mean… I guess…
:ElricFoS: Lunch tomorrow?
:AlisaFoS: …t-tell him t-to meet me on t-the main plaza. I d-don’t want t-to go s-somewhere where there a-aren’t any other people… j-just in case…
:ElricFoS: I’ll make sure he’s there on time. Don’t you worry.

The two of you stand in awkward silence for a while, with only the sound of Alisa fidgeting around nervously breaking the silence.

:AlisaFoS: So… err… I’ll… um…
:ElricFoS: Yes?
:AlisaFoS: I… I g-got some things I want to d-do tonight so… um… u-unless there was s-something else?
>>
No. 933727 ID: b1b4f3

>>933723
Did she give the necklace back yet?
Tell her if she could put in a good word with the head librarian that'd be nice. You do want access to the restricted books.
And maybe a goodbye kiss?
>>
No. 933733 ID: 7fafab

>>933723
Crisis (seemingly) averted; good job, Ema.

I think we'd be better giving a nice goodbye hug instead of a goodbye kiss.
"You're a wonderful lady, Alisa. I'm sorry for having caused you to worry."
>>
No. 933734 ID: eeb7d9

Nice, this went better than expected. We just need the necklace really, we already cause you too much trouble. Just remember what we said, she is a beautiful person, in looks and in heart.
>>
No. 933743 ID: a9af05

>>933723
Make sure she gives you the necklace.

>Unless there's something else?
Uh, isn't the curfew supposed to be in effect right now? If the guards see us out and about, they might think we're up to something and arrest us for suspicious behavior.

So can we leave or are we stuck here for the night? Because if we're stuck here, we ain't gonna be sharing a bed with Alisa. Maybe we can sleep on the floor or something? Maybe even a private room so that she won't immediately see Ema, in case she can't stay as Elric all night?

>>933733
>Hug instead of kiss
Not even a kiss on the hand?
>>
No. 933748 ID: eeb7d9

I don't think kisses are good in these circumstances.
>>
No. 933760 ID: 055cbc

I think a hand kiss is probably better than a hug, actually. Any lingering concerns about physical safety come rushing to the fore when that person steps into your personal space and wraps their arms around you. Hugs are for people you trust absolutely.
>>
No. 933763 ID: 91ee5f

>>933723
Make sure you get the necklace from her.

>OH! This is why y-you wanted those books about the undead! I see! It all makes sense now!
Looks like asking for those books earlier helped make this story more believable to her.

>I…um…a-actually…I…wouldn’t mind if…y-you stayed for a bit longer?
I’m not sure if that means she’s gonna let us sleep here or not? Maybe after hearing about the vampires, she wanted us to stay here to keep her safe? We might wanna ask if she wanted us to sleep on the floor or if “stay a little bit longer” meant just long enough to finish this conversation?

>Oh, I u-used to w-watch him t-train in t-the summer when he w-wouldn’t wear a s-shirt
Was her tail wagging when she thought about Karn training shirtless?

>…t-tell him t-to meet me on t-the main plaza. I d-don’t want t-to go s-somewhere where there a-aren’t any other people…j-just in case…
Oh, good, she’s still willing to go in the date. Although, now we’ve gotta tell Karn where she wants him to meet her, since it’s not in front of Oran’s shop like he wanted. Eh, we’ll tell him in the morning.

>>933743
>Uh, isn't the curfew supposed to be in effect right now? If the guards see us out and about, they might think we're up to something and arrest us for suspicious behavior.
That’s actually a good point.

We should tell Alisa that we don’t know if it’s a good idea for us to step outside during the curfew. We don’t need the guards arresting us.

But if she really wants us gone, then we’d better take the risk and go out into the night. And we probably could save ourselves some trouble by going to Tertian‘s house and sleeping there, instead of going in the morning.

>>933760
That’s a good reason to do a kiss on the hand instead of a hug.
>>
No. 933814 ID: 21a49f

>>933760
Hm, good point.

Also, make sure we make up a backstory for Elric to tell to Karn so he isn't confused when asked about it.
>>
No. 933966 ID: a9af05

>>933763
>I’m not sure if that means she’s gonna let us sleep here or not? Maybe after hearing about the vampires, she wanted us to stay here to keep her safe?
We can ask her if that's what she meant.
>>
No. 934186 ID: 1301e8
File 155898177734.png - (42.97KB , 700x550 , 89.png )
934186

>Crisis (seemingly) averted; good job, Ema.
Well… somewhat averted. She still clearly thinks less of you than she did before you left.
>Was her tail wagging when she thought about Karn training shirtless?
A little bit, yes. It’s quite obvious that she got a thing for muscular men.
>Oh, good, she’s still willing to go in the date. Although, now we’ve gotta tell Karn where she wants him to meet her, since it’s not in front of Oran’s shop like he wanted.
It’s not that far… and you’ll probably meet up with Oran at the shop anyway as Ema so it wouldn’t be hard to head to the festival with Karn in tow.
>Also, make sure we make up a backstory for Elric to tell to Karn so he isn't confused when asked about it.
You only need to tell him he exists and that the two of you are apparently friendly. No more than that is kind of unnecessary.


>Tell her if she could put in a good word with the head librarian that'd be nice. You do want access to the restricted books.
:AlisaFoS: Err… I’ll s-see what I can do?
>Uh, isn't the curfew supposed to be in effect right now?
:AlisaFoS: W-wait, what time is it again? Err… the curfew isn’t in effect until quite late so… I t-think you g-got like two more hours? I mean, unless you are planning on going o-outside the city, because they have p-probably already closed the gates for the night by now.
:ElricFoS: Don’t you worry, I’m not going that far. But if you’re sure it’s still a while before the guards starts arresting people…
:AlisaFoS: I m-mean, it’s not that late yet…?

>Kiss her on the hand.
You give her an elegant bow and reach out with your hand towards her, though Alisa on her part only looks at you in confusion.
:AlisaFoS: Um…?
:ElricFoS: A kiss on the hand for a fair lady?
:AlisaFoS: …oh. OH! Yes! I mean… err… h-here?
She puts her hand in yours and you move it gracefully up to your snout. You can hear her emit a small gasp as you plant your lips on her hand.
:ElricFoS: You're a wonderful lady, Alisa. I'm sorry for having caused you to worry.
:AlisaFoS: Err… t-thank you… um… Elric…

>Did she give the necklace back yet?
:ElricFoS: By the by, might I get the necklace back?
:AlisaFoS: …no.
:ElricFoS: Oh? And why is that?
:AlisaFoS: I’m still not sure you actually didn’t s-steal it… so… um… I’m going to c-check if it’s b-been reported s-stole tomorrow… err… j-just t-to be sure?
:ElricFoS: Fair enough.
:AlisaFoS: I mean… err… if it isn’t… I g-guess y-you can have it back?
>>
No. 934187 ID: 1301e8
File 155898178652.png - (35.80KB , 700x550 , 90.png )
934187

>We probably could save ourselves some trouble by going to Tertian‘s house and sleeping there, instead of going in the morning.
The two of you bids your farewells before you head out towards where Karn told you Tertian’s place was. You soon find yourself in a better part of town, right next to the river, on Strawberry road where he supposedly lived. Lives. Whatever.

As you approach what you believe is his abode, you spot three Sakkilian ladies waiting at his doorstep, seemingly expecting him to arrive at any moment. They are clearly here as clientele, desperate to have some fun tonight. Two of them smell about the same as Danus or Alisa, if a little bit darker, but the third… yum…

:NonFoS: Where is he? This is usually the best time to find him.
:FoodFoS: Come on, mommy needs some love!
:NonFoS: Geez, save it for the tramp. But if he don’t come soon, we might not make it before the curfew.
:FoodFoS: Speak for yourself, plebian, I for one live somewhere decent and won’t need to bother myself with such trivialities.

Maybe you can take advantage of their predicament? …or, you can just ignore them and take the backdoor in, as you know he got a spare key hidden back there, atop the door to the left.

Wait, how do you even know that?
>>
No. 934188 ID: eeb7d9

>Wait, how do you even know that?
Oh oh. Two things occur to me: You either got some of memory from digesting Terroza, OR, the worst case scenario, you ate Tertian on accident and you got his memory. The last one is bad. You had to ate him later.

Anyway, take the back door? Use another form, so these people don't see Ema around here.
>>
No. 934191 ID: b1b4f3

>>934187
>how do you know that
From his sister's memories I'm guessing. I think we can't search them manually but we can get bits and pieces when in relevant situations.

I think you should go inside via the back door, turn into Terroza(uh, get some new clothes for her somehow), then grab the tasty one, and tell the other two to fuck off. You can eat her for another backup food ration, after interrogating her to find out how useful her form would be.
It's looking like we really should've consumed Tertian first, since his form would've been really useful here. I wonder if eating him now to get his form would count as gluttony? Does the reason you're consuming someone matter? Then again we might not have enough time to learn the form.

...an alternative would be to go inside, switch to some really manly clothes(and wear enough makeup to make it hard to identify him), turn into Elric and answer the door to tell them you're here to fill in for Tertian since he's not going to be home tonight. They're gonna expect a subby male though, don't get dominant again.
>>
No. 934192 ID: b1b4f3

...hmm, eating a good person is bad. What about laying with a bad person? Is there any downside to that, aside from it being kindof weird, like fucking your food?
>>
No. 934195 ID: a9af05

>>934187
>women outside of Tertian’s house
Yeah, if there are women outside of his house all the time, they're definitely going to notice that he's not around anymore, if he's not here consistently.

I honestly think you should just quietly go in the backdoor and ignore all of them. They'll be expecting Tertian and since you don't have his form yet, you can't answer the door and have some fun with them.

>Wait, how do you even know that?
You probably got it from Terroza's memories, since she probably visits her brother from time to time.

>>934191
>Wear makeup, answer door as Elric, claim we're filling in for him.
I doubt they'll believe what a random stranger in Tertian's house will tell them. They'll more likely run off to get a guard.

Even if they did buy that story, I highly doubt Elric will be able to satisfy all of them in bed at the same time. Because if Tertian has someone fill in for him, then that means that his stand in should be able to handle all of these women at once. Elric could barely handle going 2 rounds with 1 woman, so I have my doubts on handling all 3 of these women.
>>
No. 934204 ID: 79eaac

>>934187
Let's just get in through the back, get some clothes, and get out. Bad idea to stay here all night.
>>
No. 934205 ID: a9af05

>>934195
We should also be careful on who we show our Terroza and Tertian forms to, since it would be weird if either of them were seen around town after we told Alisa what happened to them.

>>934204
Don't forget to also grab any money we find! The only problem is being quiet and not letting these ladies know someone is in the house. Or we could just wait for them to leave.

>Bad idea to stay here all night.
Then where do we go? We can't go to any of the inns, since they'll all be full. And we can't go to Danus, since we told him we'd being going on a date with someone else tomorrow and I'm pretty sure you shouldn't ask to share a bed with someone after you just told them you be dating someone else tomorrow.

The only options left would be to ask either Karn or Oran if we can stay with them.
>>
No. 934234 ID: 79eaac

>>934205
What's wrong with staying at one of their places for the night? Seems like a much better idea than sleeping someplace we're completely unfamiliar with that we know is involved in some shady shit.
Let's head over to whoever's is closer.

Worse comes to worst, we can just sleep on a couch at the in. Doubt Danus'd mind.
>>
No. 934248 ID: a9af05

>>934234
>What's wrong with staying at one of their places for the night?
I never said anything was wrong with staying with either Karn or Oran. I was just pointing out that they were our only other options, since we can't share a bed with Danus tonight.
>>
No. 934262 ID: 91ee5f

>>934187
>spare key
>Wait, how do you even know that?
From Terroza.

Let’s just get in, grab clothes, grab money, and get out. We don’t need these ladies to be hassling us. Make sure you bring the key in with you, quietly close the door, and lock it from the inside in case any of these ladies try to come around the back.

When you leave, make sure you take the spare key with you and lock the back door. Just in case you need to come back here in the future.
>>
No. 934545 ID: 1301e8
File 155933907342.png - (60.21KB , 700x550 , 91.png )
934545

>Use another form, so these people don't see Ema around here.
You’re still in your Elric form, so that won’t be a problem.
>You ate Tertian on accident and you got his memory.
…nnno? You’re pretty sure he’s still alive and well? Well might be the wrong word, but still.
>You probably got it from Terroza's memories, since she probably visits her brother from time to time.
That’s has to be it. It’s not so much as it’s a memory, as it’s a… reflex? Muscle memory might be the right word? It just feels like you’ve done this a million times so your body just does it on auto pilot.

>It's looking like we really should've consumed Tertian first, since his form would've been really useful here.
As much as you’d like to continue infecting all the pretty girls in town, you… err… actually, having Tertian’s form right now would be awesome…
>I wonder if eating him now to get his form would count as gluttony?
You are a bit peckish after going around as Elric so long… and you’re pretty sure doing Alisa did drain some power from you, but you’re still not that hungry. Let’s save him for a while longer, just in case.
>Does the reason you're consuming someone matter?
The only good reason is hunger, otherwise you’re just a glutton.
>...hmm, eating a good person is bad. What about laying with a bad person? Is there any downside to that, aside from it being kind of weird, like fucking your food?
As fun as it would be, it would be kind of pointless if you ate them afterwards, as you would gain just as much energy from it as if you hadn’t had your fun. But no, there’s no reason like that why you can’t feed of evil people in that way. You are after all feeding off Karn, aren’t you?

>Turn into Terroza, then grab the tasty one and tell the other two to fuck off. You can eat her for another backup food ration, after interrogating her to find out how useful her form would be.
Hmm… temping… but you’ll need to get some better clothes for Terroza first. No way will she fit the ones you’re currently wearing.
>...an alternative would be to go inside, switch to some really manly clothes(and wear enough makeup to make it hard to identify him), turn into Elric and answer the door to tell them you're here to fill in for Tertian since he's not going to be home tonight.
You’re pretty sure they are neither dumb, drunk nor high enough to trust some random person like that. Besides, they are here for Tertian’s magic… “fingers”, not some random Sakkilian guy’s.


>I honestly think you should just quietly go in the backdoor and ignore all of them.
They on their part ignore as well as you take a sharp turn into the alleyway leading to the back of his house. Then you simply grab the key from its hidey hole and let yourself in. You’re met with the overwhelming smell of sweet fragrances of all kinds, coupled with an overabundance of velvet, silk and the color pink. Pillows line almost all the corners and large velvet drapery hangs from almost every wall, not counting the ones adored with some very risqué art. (Wait, is that a nude of Tertian himself or…?)

>The only problem is being quiet and not letting these ladies know someone is in the house.
They house is surely soundproof; at least to the degree that someone would be able to shout Tertian’s name without anyone else hearing it. All the windows on their part are also completely covered by velvet drapes so there’s no chance they’ll see you either… though, you might cast a shadow if you get to close, so you better be careful about that.
>grab clothes, grab money.
Now, where would he keep his clothes… and coin? You find what you believe is a bedroom… or at least a room with a bed with several shelves, wardrobes and closets so it make a good spot as any to start your search. Opening one of the wardrobes, you find several shelves filled to the brim with similar clothes that he was wearing when you ate him, neatly folded into different piles.

Then the smell hits you. It was hidden under all the incense and sweet aroma, but you feel it getting stronger. Someone else is in here with you, someone less... savory. As you hear footsteps coming down the corridor just outside the room you’re in, you start looking around for a hiding spot, but you barely have time to move, let alone find a good spot to disappear into.
>>
No. 934546 ID: 1301e8
File 155933908240.png - (89.57KB , 700x550 , 92.png )
934546

:FoodFoS: ‘eeey, Tertian! Terty! Tert! I didn’t hear you, dude.

Before you have the time to hide properly, a Hiver lady stumbles into view. She sways from side to side and has to keep a firm grip on the door frame to ensure she doesn’t fall over. It takes a few seconds before she reacts to your presence, as if she didn’t even notice you standing right in front of her.

:FoodFoS: Terty Terty Terty, what’s up, what’s… up? Hey…? Why, are you… like… trying to get behind the curtain? Haha!
:ElricFoS: Err…
:FoodFoS: Whoa! When did you learn to fly Terti, Tertian, Tert? Haha! Also, nice duds. Not the shit you usually wear, tert, but I dig, eh?
:ElricFoS: …Thanks?
:FoodFoS: You don’t mind if I let myself in, Tertian? Terti? I was just coming over to collect the stuff, eh? Most of it was useless as usual, but there’s some good shit in there. Haha! Hey, didn’t you like… tell me you found this ring that I could sell for some… good shit or some shit? Yeah, didn’t find it anywhere, man…
:ElricFoS: Yeah, the ring… it’s some good shit. It’s… around here somewhere?
:FoodFoS: Speaking of some good shit, this shit is some good stuff. From the snake boy, right? This is some shit! Haha!
:ElricFoS: It sure is.
:FoodFoS: Haha! Hey, hey! You know, you should tell your sis to get people with actual pocket money, hey? So I don’t have to sell some shitty copper bracelets and shit, eh? Haha… oh, hey! I know! Why don’t you tell her to grab some cute Hiver boys next time, eh? They are always so feisty when they are desperate, haha!

She takes another swing from the bottle in her claws before almost falling over. She’s clearly under the influence of something and going by the smell it’s the same stuff Tertian was doing. Though, she smells way stronger of it, but even then she can’t mask the sweet smell of delicious evil under it.

:FoodFoS: Whoa! Rainbows! Neat! Haha!
>>
No. 934552 ID: b1b4f3

>>934545
>karn
Karn isn't evil. He's just a bad person. Remember, misdeeds come in a sliding scale. Also I'm starting to think we should raise the bar a little. Karn beats up people who he thinks are harassing him, even without evidence-- that's not exactly a crime worthy of death. He thinks his victims deserve it. Oran is just a drug dealer, again not worth death. He doesn't think of himself as hurting anyone. Tertian... might be the new bar. Set it a bit lower than him and our meal compass is better calibrated.

>>934546
Sounds like Tertian has indeed been a very bad boy. He spots targets for his sister to rob or worse, and profits from it. So does this hiver lady.
It would be really easy to just walk over and grab her. Only possible issue is that she's full of drugs right now. If you eat her, will you get a dose of the drugs too? You might have to tell her to to bed, and you can snatch her up later when she's sober. If you can find that ring first, that could get her to calm down and sleep off the potions.
>>
No. 934565 ID: 17f233

>>934546
Knock out the hiver woman and hide the body behind the counter. snoop round and make time. We can eat her when the drug have finished passing through her system.
>>
No. 934572 ID: eeb7d9

>You are a bit peckish after going around as Elric so long… and you’re pretty sure doing Alisa did drain some power from you, but you’re still not that hungry. Let’s save him for a while longer, just in case.
I am proud of you, you are showing some restraining!

Why don't we try to make her talk some more, take information out of her, some more details about what she doas, what Tertian and his sister do. Specially the part about Oran, i am going to guess, that could be useful.
>>
No. 934579 ID: a9af05

>>934546
>Hiver lady
>Hi Tertian!
It's a good thing she's really high and your Elric form has red scales just like Tertian, otherwise she'd be panicking over a stranger in her friend's house!

This also shows that if random people will be letting themselves in, you can't sleep here. Looks like you'll have to go to either Oran or Karn to sleep at their place.

>What do?
Hope she passes out and then start looking around for clothes and money and whatever else could be useful.

Don't take any of the potions, since you wouldn't want the guards to catch you with them.

>>934552
>Change food bar to be a little below Tertian.
Yeah, that's probably for the best.

According to Ema, Tertian was a 50% evil, so just below that would make our bar at 45% evil. Meaning anyone that's 46% or higher is food.

Let's test out the new food bar on this lady. Where does she sit on it?

>>934572
>Make her talk more about Oran.
It's most likely stuff we already know about him.

And if you're hoping she'll tell us about the drugs, I doubt she's in any condition to tell us anything useful.

You also can't blame Oran for still making these potions behind Ema's back, since Tertian probably had a bunch stockpiled here at his house before we told Oran to stop making them. Besides, I highly doubt Oran is the only one making these things.
>>
No. 934585 ID: b1b4f3

>>934579
I think it's that she lives here too.

If necessary we can remove the spare key to make the house secure. Or at least make it obvious when someone else is going to be here.
>>
No. 934589 ID: 91ee5f

>>934546
Don’t eat her yet. The Swords told you that you can still be affected by potions, so it stands to reason that you’d also end up being addicted to these potions if you ate someone that’s probably finished drinking a whole barrel of the stuff.

Don’t forget that the main reason you’re here is to take any clothes that can fit your male forms and take any money you can find.

>>934552
>readjust food qualifications
Good idea.

>>934585
>I think it's that she lives here too.
That’s a possibility.

There’s also a possibility that she’s not the only one that lives here and Tertian has a harem of women that live with him.
>>
No. 934593 ID: 094652

I thought there would be cake or a burger or maybe some rack-of-lamb or even ice cream. Do you love fried chicken drumsticks?

As for the Hiver, see if you can get them to confess intel before you do the dirty. If you can, get her to come home with you. You do not want to have your vore recorded as a training video for the guards to 'study'. Vigorously.
>>
No. 934595 ID: 7fafab

>>934546
"Hey swords, if we ate a person on drugs, would we get high right then, or when we digested them, or not at all?"

If not immediately, I'm thinking we just schloomp her up now before shenanigans can occur. We can vomit her out later if the drugs would eventually affect us - she'll probably just assume it was a really weird trip.

Otherwise, paralyze, and drag her around if you can keep your hand on her without making too much noise; otherwise, we'll either have to get her out of the house or just stab the thot.
>>
No. 934752 ID: 1301e8
File 155951179330.png - (79.02KB , 700x550 , 93.png )
934752

>I am proud of you, you are showing some restraining!
If it means you can eat more later you’ll gladly eat less today.
>I Thought there would be cake or a burger or maybe some rack-of-lamb or even ice cream. Do you love fried chicken drumsticks?
…you just have a hankering for some chicken right now, alright? (…maybe you should find another Varkian to eat…)
>Karn isn't evil. He's just a bad person. Remember, misdeeds come in a sliding scale.
Which is why you’re giving him a chance to become better… but if he refuses to change…
>Also I'm starting to think we should raise the bar a little. Karn beats up people who he thinks are harassing him, even without evidence-- that's not exactly a crime worthy of death. He thinks his victims deserve it.
He is still hurting innocent people, even if in his own twisted mind he believes they are guilty. Your very reason for existing is to protect those that are innocent, thus you cannot let him continue, no matter his motives. If he refuses to change you’ll have no choice but to protect those that he hurts in the only way you can. Don’t ask what he deserves, but what those that he hurts deserve.
>Oran is just a drug dealer, again not worth death. He doesn't think of himself as hurting anyone.
Yet he quite clearly does, no matter what he thinks. You don’t know how dangerous his drug is yet, but it’s clearly addictive. There’s a reason why that shit is illegal. Maybe looking into what, exactly, his drug does would be prudent.

>Sounds like Tertian have indeed been a very bad boy. He spots targets for his sister to rob or worse, and profits from it. So does this hiver lady.
Worse is probably the right word. This Hiver outright said that Hiver boys they brought in would do anything when they were desperate. That doesn’t really sound like robbery, does it?
>It's a good thing she's really high and your Elric form has red scales just like Tertian, otherwise she'd be panicking over a stranger in her friend's house!
You’re pretty sure she’s so out there right now that she wouldn’t panic even if the building was on fire. It does making her trust you way easier, though.
>This also shows that if random people will be letting themselves in, you can't sleep here.
The question is, are there anyone else that would let themselves in? You’re pretty sure his sister would let herself in when she needed him… and this Hiver clearly has some kind of business relationship with him. But other than that… hmm….
>There’s also a possibility that she’s not the only one that lives here and Tertian has a harem of women that live with him.
…his harem is his clientele? And they pay him to sleep here, they don’t just let themselves in without his permission.
>If necessary we can remove the spare key to make the house secure. Or at least make it obvious when someone else is going to be here.
You’ve already pocketed the key just to make sure no one else can enter his abode. You’re probably safe here.

>According to Ema, Tertian was a 50% evil, so just below that would make our bar at 45% evil. Meaning anyone that's 46% or higher is food.
Here’s the thing, your snoot isn’t really that precise that you can tell exactly how evil someone is. You can make some comparisons with people you’ve smelled recently, but even then you’re doing it out of memory, which isn’t really reliable. Of course, that doesn’t mean you won’t try.
>Let's test out the new food bar on this lady. Where does she sit on it?
…you’re not sure. A bit under Tertian, you think? It’s hard to tell with all those sweet smelling substances she’s covered in.
>You do not want to have your vore recorded as a training video for the guards to 'study'. Vigorously.
…how would they record anything? …and why here?
>"Hey swords, if we ate a person on drugs, would we get high right then, or when we digested them, or not at all?"
:SwordFoS: When you absorb them, you’ll absorb all other organic substances they have on their person as well. So yes, you would indeed become influenced by any substance your meal currently have going through their bloodstream at the time of consummation.


>Why don't we try to make her talk some more, take information out of her.
:ElricFoS: So, hey, what kind of stuff did you find to sell this time?
:FooDFoS: Oh, you know, the usual. Cheap jewelry, odd knick knacks and maybe some nice clothes here and there. I still want that ring you promised me, haha!
:ElricFoS: Sure… and the stuff you won’t sell?
:FooDFoS: I left it in the boxes as usual. Mostly clothes. Haha, I don’t know why your sis wants them naked, Terti. Whatever slavery she sells them into I can’t see why they can’t keep their clothes, eh? Maybe she just likes seeing them squirm naked, Haha!
:ElricFoS: Err… yeah, that does sound like sis alright.
:FooDFoS: Have no idea how she gets them out of the city, though. Know a bunch of smugglers and none of them know anyone who gets people out of the city. A lot of people going in, but not out. Haha, it’s doesn’t make any sense! OH! MAYBE THEY FLY OUT! HAHA!
:ElricFoS: So… about the good shit you’re drinking?
:FooDFoS: Oh! OH YEAH! This stuff! Sorry for stealing a bottle or two from you, but I really needed a hit, man. Haha, you’re a life saver, you know! But yeah, never tried this one before, the one you get from the snake dude, eh? Some good shit. A bit weak at first but after the second bottle… oh geez… you just… Haha… fly… man…? You want some, Terti?
:ElricFoS: Not right now, but thanks for asking.
:FooDFoS: Eh, your loss.

She finally loses her balance and fall to the floor into her knees. After a few seconds of just sitting there waiting for the fall to register, she crawls towards you before lunging towards you, catching your legs in a tight hug.

:FooDFoS: Come on, Terti, when are you done here!?
:ElricFoS: Err…
:FooDFoS: I’m sick and tired of… of your sister and… and all this…
:ElricFoS:
:FooDFoS: Can’t we just… leave? Like we talked about? Just leave and… go somewhere else… away from all this? Away from your sis? Away from… this?
:ElricFoS:
:FooDFoS: I… I want to see the sea… maybe… just the two of us… living somewhere with a view of the sea… without all the lies… wouldn’t that be… grand?
:ElricFoS:

>I'm thinking we just schloomp her up now before shenanigans can occur.
While it would be the easiest course of action, you might regret getting those drugs of hers inside you. Then again, maybe you can just let her sober up inside you before you absorb her?
>Knock out the hiver woman and hide the body behind the counter. We can eat her when the drug have finished passing through her system.
Not seeing a counter to hide her behind aside, knocking her out wouldn’t be too hard. You think? You’ve never knocked anyone out before…
>You might have to tell her to bed, and you can snatch her up later when she's sober.
Hmm… she does trust you… so convincing her to go to bed wouldn’t be too hard.
>just stab the thot.
And miss out on a free meal? But then again, maybe she isn’t the beast meal… hmm…
>Don’t forget that the main reason you’re here is to take any clothes that can fit your male forms and take any money you can find.
Right. But first you need to deal with this hiver lady. Do you just “Schloomp” her up, knock her out, convince her to go to sleep or do you just stab her to death?

It doesn’t help that she currently hugging your legs hard enough to stop the blood circulation.

:FooDFoS: I love you, Tert… love… you… heh… can you… kiss me… like you usually do?
>>
No. 934756 ID: eeb7d9

Fucking really?
You know what, no. No mercy, she knew she was doing bad shit, she knew his sister was sending people to their slavery, and she did nothing but benefit from it. And Tertian too, he even got pleasure of knowing you would be a next victim. They all fucked up. To the belly with them.

But before that, we need to know who else knows of their dirty deeds, just to make sure who else is our next target and to be careful, because their disappearance will not be noticed.

And finally, now we know what exactly was Oran selling and to whom. We need to have a serious chat with that boy.
>>
No. 934757 ID: b1b4f3

>>934752
Karn can be stopped in another way. Find the people he's hurt, find out which of them are innocent and which are guilty, and confront him with that information. Maybe even find out who is currently harassing him so he doesn't think you're working against him.
Again, both Oran and Karn are not evil. They are bad people, doing harm through self-delusion, ignorance, and frustration brought out by their bad situations. Evil people do harm to the innocent while knowing that they're doing it, because they feel other people are inferior or otherwise not worth caring about, and have something to gain from hurting them. Oran and Karn do care about people, they're just not seeing the truth of their actions. The true nature of a person is revealed when they know exactly what they're doing.
Also, from what you're saying right now, it sounds like you'd consider someone guilty of murder if they accidentally killed someone. Motive matters!

>victims are naked, never seen leaving the city
I think they're being fed to the vampires. Tertian probably didn't know, though. He'd smell guiltier if he did.

>hiver lady is high as fuck, being weird about Tertian, feeling guilty
I'm not so sure she should be eaten, at this point. She obviously wants to stop doing bad things, and if you can't smell her properly due to the drugs then you shouldn't trust your nose.
Tell her you're not in the mood for kisses. You've had a bad day. ...tell her if she wants out, you can arrange things. Tell her you'll talk again in the morning after she sobers up.
In the morning, you should talk to her again. I'm not sure what form is best, but she'd definitely recognize Terroza.
>>
No. 934759 ID: b1b4f3

Even if she is super guilty and shows no signs of remorse when sober, we DO need someone to interrogate! She's a drug addict and we have access to her drug dealer. That means we can get information from her in exchange for drugs.
We at least need more names, who else is involved in the "slavery" ring.

...hang on, is this the "messenger" that was seen talking to one of the vampires?
>>
No. 934761 ID: 094652

Convince her to follow you, then knock her out and tie her up when you're near Kern's place. Vomit Tertian and tie him up, let them talk it out and see what happens.

If they suck, free pantry. If not, then you have a chance to interrogate without absorbing their drugs.
>>
No. 934768 ID: 79eaac

>>934752
As I originally said, if the drugs would affect us, let's schloomp her up now and vomit her out when we're done casing the place. Who's gonna believe some drugged-out insect if she even remembers in the first place?
>>
No. 934770 ID: 79eaac

>>934768
"Swallow now, vomit later" if the drugs would affect us when we fully digest her, not merely swallow.
Otherwise, we either find a way to keep her silent and still, or go Bennie Troung on the bitch except with a knife instead of your dick.
>>
No. 934772 ID: 91ee5f

>>934759
>...hang on, is this the "messenger" that was seen talking to one of the vampires?
Shit. If she is the messenger, then that means the vampire hunters might be nearby looking for her or they’ve followed her here and are waiting for the right moment to kick in the door to come interrogate her!

And if they kick in the door and catch us in the middle of eating her, then they’ll be chasing after us! Which would be even worse if it turns out the drugs in her system affects us, even if we don’t absorb her!

Not only would a drugged up Ema have a hard time running away, she would also be more likely to eat innocent people!
>>
No. 934792 ID: a9af05

>>934752
>You’ve never knocked anyone out before…
Shouldn't you have a memory of how to do that from one of the swords previous owners?

I'm pretty sure knocking someone out with either the sheath or the butt of your sword falls under "skills associated with swords" that you should be able to use. Unless that's something else the swords failed to mention that you don't have access to.

Perhaps she's drugged up enough that, once you touch her head and paralyze her, she'll pass out?

>>934772
I also don't like how there's a possibility Athena and Kern could show up any moment now.

We really don't need them catching us eating someone nor do we need Ema so drugged up that she could attack them or accidentally reveal herself as an undead.
>>
No. 934932 ID: 1301e8
File 155977660639.png - (88.84KB , 700x550 , 94.png )
934932

>Shouldn't you have a memory of how to do that from one of the swords previous owners?
You do know hitting someone over the head with the hilt of the sword with enough force will generally make them stop moving. Now, if it’s because they are dead or because you just gave them enough head trauma to give them some permanent brain damage depends on how hard headed they are. Either way, knocking out people is surprisingly hard if you want to keep them in a good shape afterwards, apparently?
>Perhaps she's drugged up enough that, once you touch her head and paralyze her, she'll pass out?
Hmm, it’s possible… or her drugged up state might just make it harder to knock her out, as her body won’t feel that it’s supposed to go unconscious.
>Now we know what exactly was Oran selling and to whom. We need to have a serious chat with that boy.
You still aren’t sure what exactly this substance is and what its effects are, but yes, you’ll need to give him a stern talking to and attempt to convince him to stop this nonsense.
>Karn can be stopped in another way. Find the people he's hurt, find out which of them are innocent and which are guilty, and confront him with that information.
And then make sure he feel guilty about it and redeem himself. He can’t continue causing harm like that.

>...tell her if she wants out, you can arrange things.
:FooDFoS: Arrange things? Why can’t we just leave? Just grab our stuff and leave for the horizon at sunrise? Just… fly away! Weee….
:ElricFoS: We can’t just leave like that, can we?
:FooDFoS: Why not? Haha, it’s not like anyone would come looking for us or anything… we’ll just disappear… and be gone… poof… like magic! MAGIC! HAHA!
:ElricFoS: How are we supposed to live without any gold to our names?
:FooDFoS: Hah… haha… Terti, Terti, Terti. I have so much fucking coin after all those suckers we’ve sold… don’t you have it too? Or did it also go poof? Haha…
:ElricFoS: Err… sure…
:FooDFoS: Also, you’re a fucking gold mine! Gold fucker! Whatever! Haha!
>We need to know who else knows of their dirty deeds, just to make sure who else is our next target.
:ElricFoS: So… hey, do you know when we’re supposed to… sell the next sucker?
:FooDFoS: Haha, why are you asking me that, Terti? You and your ugly sis are the ones who take care of that shit. I just sell the stuff we pilfer from the corpses! Haha! I mean… not actually corpses, but you get it! Wait, why are you suddenly asking me about that? Are you… not Tertian? Gasp! I knew it!
:ElricFoS: Wha-
:FooDFoS: You’re his evil twin! AWESOME! Let’s have a threesome!
:ElricFoS: I’m not my own evil twin, love.
:FooDFoS: Aw…
:ElricFoS: Anyway, speaking of my Sis… what do you think she does with everyone we… catch?
:FooDFoS: Eh, probably sell them to some silver mines or something? It’s those creepy twins that pick them up right? Don’t they own some mine or something? But who the fuck cares? They are probably going to be dead in a few years anyway. Those fucking silver mines are death traps, Haha!
:ElricFoS: …if you say so.

>No mercy, she knew she was doing bad shit, she knew his sister was sending people to their slavery, and she did nothing but benefit from it. And Tertian too, he even got pleasure of knowing you would be a next victim. They all fucked up. To the belly with them.
She is clearly evil and needs to be stopped.
>Even if she is super guilty and shows no signs of remorse when sober, we DO need someone to interrogate! She's a drug addict and we have access to her drug dealer.
You’ve already tried asking her a few questions, but it’s clear she either doesn’t know anything or she’s too high to really talk. Either way, you’ll need to wait for her to sober up a bit first.
>Let's schloomp her up now and vomit her out when we're done casing the place.
Let’s make sure she can’t get away in a way that someone can’t accidently walk in on. You also need to know if you actually can get people out from there and it would be better if you tried it on someone that you wouldn’t miss instead of one that you would. Though, you have to wonder… just how out there is she? Hmm…

:ElricFoS: Hey, I just remember where I put that ring. See, I kind of accidently… swallowed it?
:FooDFoS: What? Really? Haha, I guess we just have to… ew… wait for it to come out then?
:ElricFoS: You got long arms, don’t you? Maybe you can pull it out?
:FooDFoS: What? You mean… you want me to just reach into there and… pull it out?
:ElricFoS: Have you ever tried? Your arms are longer than my upper body after all, so it wouldn’t be a problem, right?
:FooDFoS: …wait, you can do that? I didn’t know that! Haha! Why haven’t anyone else told me that before? Open up, I’m going in!
:ElricFoS: You’re wh- MFF!?

She practically shoves her arm into your maw before you can do anything else. You didn’t expect her to be this easy to convince.

:FooDFoS: Open wider! I can almost reach it! I… think? Haha… geez… I didn’t think this was possible?
:ElricFoS: Mff!?
>>
No. 934933 ID: 1301e8
File 155977661554.png - (79.50KB , 700x550 , 95.png )
934933

The original plan was to trick her into leaning close enough for you to gobble her up, but instead she practically feed herself to you. Even as her head and shoulders disappear into you she continue pressing herself further, seemingly desperate to find out just how deep the rabbit hole goes. By the time her feet loses their footing you can simply lean your head back and let gravity do the rest. She has to have been the easiest meal yet… to bad you’ll probably need to get her out later…

Either way… err… whatever her name was, she’s been dealt with for now.

>I think they're being fed to the vampires.
…that sounds way too plausible. It would explain both why so many people have disappeared, but also why they don’t seem to leave the city either. This place is just a huge smörgåsbord for those fiends!
>...hang on, is this the "messenger" that was seen talking to one of the vampires?
…she was a fence, not a messenger. Unless she was selling stolen goods to them, you don’t think she had anything to do with them personally. There’s a ton of Hivers in this city after all, so the chances of it being her is rather slim.
>If she is the messenger, then that means the vampire hunters might be nearby looking for her or they’ve followed her here and are waiting for the right moment to kick in the door to come interrogate her!
You’re pretty sure they would have kicked down the door long before you even got here! Otherwise, they are probably waiting for you to leave, if they know you’re here. Less witnesses that way, right?
>If they kick in the door and catch us in the middle of eating her, then they’ll be chasing after us!
Even if they kicked in the door the moment you started eating her, you gobbled her up so fast that she would be gone by the time they reached this room. You’re really getting the hang of this eating business after all.
>>
No. 934934 ID: 1301e8
File 155977662362.png - (58.64KB , 700x550 , 96.png )
934934

>Don’t forget that the main reason you’re here is to take any clothes that can fit your male forms and take any money you can find.
Right, remember your priorities. Time to search this place from top to bottom.



Having gone through every cupboard, shelf and cabinet, you can safely say that you’ve found everything that might be interesting to you. Not counting all of his… “working tools” and the like.

You found several boxes full of clothes, both male and females ones, coming in all kind of shapes and sizes. (Is that a freaking wizard hat?). It would be enough to find new clothes for every last of your forms.

Beyond that you also found a huge bag filled to the brim with coin, enough for any kind of purchase you might need for the near future.

Then there’s this small bottled labeled as a very potent sleeping drug, which might come in handy?

The curfew is probably starting soon, so if you don’t want to spend the night here you’ll probably need to leave right now. The problem is, there’s no way you can take all of this with you… and most of this stuff would probably be rather bad to have on your person in case the guards find you. Which means that you might need to stay here for the night? It would give you enough time to go through the clothes, right?

Oh, and there’s drugs. A lot of drug bottles, though most of them are empty.
>>
No. 934937 ID: eeb7d9

Maybe you can gobble these things up? I mean, you can do it with the swords, right?

You can put a new set of clothes now too.

I don't like the idea of spending the night here. Unless we have no other choice, i would look for somewhere else. If you must stay here, use your Bird guy form, just in case. AND make sure all entrences are closed.
>>
No. 934941 ID: b1b4f3

>>934932
>And then make sure he feel guilty about it and redeem himself.
It's his choice. You can't force someone to be good, only convince them to try to change. Stop threatening to eat him, for starters.
>She is clearly evil
There you go with that word again. At least state their sins when you judge them. But yes, she's a slaver who expects the slaves to die, which basically makes her an accessory to murder. She and Tertian deserve the death penalty. She wants to run away, but apparently that's not because she empathizes with her victims, so she's not likely to redeem herself either, and neither will Tertian I expect.

>Tertian and his sister did all the selling of slaves
...how long will Tertian stay fresh? We need to at least find out who one of their contacts is so "Terroza" can visit them for the next link in the chain... I wonder if his bedroom is soundproof? That would make it an excellent interrogation location. Any way to tell?
>>934934
>STUFF
He didn't have a diary? Or anything like that? No clues as to who he's dealing with?
We may have to search Terroza's place if we're absolutely not puking up Tertian. ...or maybe that edible lady outside is one of his contacts?

Take a portion of the gold so you don't have to carry around a conspicuously large bag. I'm not sure how to handle the clothes, aside from packing them in a suitcase or something. Don't take any drugs outside at night.
>>
No. 934942 ID: 7fafab

First up, pour out all the drugs

Could you eat the clothes and vomit them up later, or would you absorb them? Is your stomach a Bag of Holding plus a Bag of Devouring?
If not, wear a pair or two of the skimpier clothes beneath your other clothes, and wear whatever you have/found that's more concealing on top. Easy.

Just take some of the gold - a decent amount, but not enough to where you jingle like a greedy gold goblin.

Also, we're totally taking that pimpin' wizard hat.
+5 to pussy slaying when you wear one of those.
>>
No. 934944 ID: 7fafab

>>934942
Once we're done, vomit up the insect inside the house and give 'er a brand new hole on the neck.
>>
No. 934945 ID: 7fafab

>>934944
Or just stab right through her head. Iunno where the best place to stab insects is, so that's probably the best choice.
>>
No. 934946 ID: b1b4f3

>>934944
>>934945
Why kill her without eating her?
>>
No. 934950 ID: 7fafab

>>934946
Swords said we'd get the drugs inside her.
>>
No. 934958 ID: a9af05

>>934934
Let's not stay here. There's no telling if those "twins" will show up.

Head for Oran to spend the night with him.

>Clothes
Make sure you get some that are Varkian sized and Serpent shaped, since you've also got Varkian and Serpent forms.

And look for some stretchy clothes, so that you don't have to worry about destroying them when you change sizes.

>Money
Only grab some of it. Grab what you think you'll need to spend on the date tomorrow.

And grab what you think you need for a breastplate to protect your core. Try to buy one that's small enough to be concealed under your clothes.

>>934937
>Eat these things?
Can't do that. The clothes will be dissolved because they're made of organic materials. The coins will be rusted beyond use. The drugs are too dangerous to be eating.

>>934950
We can wait until she's not drugged to eat her.
>>
No. 934964 ID: c49ece

Take the clothes and gold, bury or hide the probably illegal sleeping drugs in a place only you will know to look. You'll sneak past curfew no problem; As you've proven in both the forest and the sewers, you're worlds better at sneaking than you are at, well, anything remotely social or cerebral. Even if you do manage to get caught, you can either bribe or eat a (almost certainly corrupt) guard that tries to stop you and probably get away with it since you've technically got nothing illegal on you. That seems unlikely so long as you keep to the alleyways or rooftops though, or try to make your way through the sewers.
>>
No. 934966 ID: 17f233

>>934934
I’d say close up the shop early & hunker down for the night. Spit out our hiver girl & tie her up and I guess make conversation some more through the hours as we wait for drugs to get out of her system.
Decide if we’re hungry enough to eat her than vs normal killing vs more storing her in our hammerspace vs letting her survive when the time for it comes (strongly in favour of making her a more long-term character)

Actually maybe we can put her to use on the side of good by drugging her back up to cloud 9 & keeping her there after we’re done with extracting info out of the hiver while she’s sober. She can be a malleable tool while she’s drugged and this store & body can be as good a hiding place as any for the time we can set her to any number of simple jobs a least for a little while tommorow. Take all ‘our’ cash to a stash site, send her onher drug dealing rounds but with the addendum that she ask for her buyer’s names & addresses, lots of things.

Personally I think that we at some point should drop our disguise & declaring our righteous existence for purging evil in front of her during the ‘sober’ interrogation at some point. If we kill her after, no biggie, if we go with the drug her plot I suggested she’ll just think she had another trip.

>>934944
>>934945
This seems to be a problem based solely around us lacking in education about Hiver anatomy. I think that it a a problem which requires amending, when we get around to spitting her up for a sober interrogation & possible execution we should go about poking around her body. Strip down the bug, ask about the history & culture of her people & test for chinks in the chiton, bodily features of note, where her sex hole is, areas of sensitivity on her hiver body are, all in the persuit of fucking the brains out of a hive-I mean acquiring scholarly on hands knowlage for future slaying of evil.
>>
No. 934975 ID: 7fafab

>>934958
Still don't think it's a good idea to digest her now or later. We do inherit slight impulses from those we eat - don't want one to be "crippling drug addiction".

>>934966
I doubt a drug-addled criminal will be of any use to us.
I especially doubt she's willing to try to get off the stuff, or able to keep secrets.

Though I am in 100% favor of fucking an insect, I am not interested in this one. Going off what she's told us so far, she barely knows anything more.
We can garner anatomical knowledge from books at the library, most likely - there, we shall learn whether insect has pusspuss or cloaca.
Yes, I am extremely fun at parties.
>>
No. 934981 ID: e19578

>>934932
Explore the shop layout, lock the doors, close the shade, flip the little open/closed sign thingie. Spit the hiver out/truss up & prepare on the some kind of setup to keep blood splatters to a minimum. Ideally once sober she’ll put 2&2 together from the setup that she’s on a very thin line between life and death. We do some serious talk & I guess see what her plea case is for us to not murder her. ( Death by overdosing?)

>>934966
Wow, that’s actually even more brutal than what I was going for. I’ll +1 behind some of this as well. Namely the sex anatomy inspection. I doubt that keeping her alive & drugged to do some work for us while high will really take off but I still dig it all the same and kinda hope it happens. This story needs more Hiver.
>>
No. 934983 ID: 91ee5f

>>934934
Take some of the money, take some of the clothes, turn off all the lights, lock all the doors and windows, leave the house. Make sure you bring the key with you.

>>934958
>Make sure you get some that are Varkian sized and Serpent shaped, since you've also got Varkian and Serpent forms.
Better include some Hiver shaped clothes for when we eventually get a Hiver form.

>>934966
>(strongly in favour of making her a more long-term character)
With how evil she is, the only way she’ll be a long term character is as another form for Ema to turn into.

>>934975
>We do inherit slight impulses from those we eat
The key word there is slight. We easily got rid of Vivian’s impulses when we turned into her the first time. And when we turned into her in front of Karn, Ema didn’t have any sort of reaction towards Karn that would suggest that those impulses still remained.

I’m thinking that once we turn into someone, those “slight impulses” only stick around for a little bit and then they go away, which would remove any risk of becoming a drug addict.

>>934981
>Explore the shop layout
>flip the little open/closed sign thingie
This isn’t a shop, this is a house. Why do you think it’s a shop?
>>
No. 934988 ID: caf1de

why is the picture of people we see as food always a chicken leg
i get it for varks but
>>
No. 935008 ID: 79eaac

>>934981
nonconsensual sexual acts are not just

>>934988
Maybe Ema just really likes chicken.
>>
No. 935009 ID: 17f233

>>935008
It would be consensual if she’s high at the time of inspection. Loophole acquired.
>>
No. 935013 ID: 91ee5f

>>935009
That’s not even close to being consensual! That’s taking advantage of someone while they’re unable to think clearly!
>>
No. 935030 ID: 1301e8
File 155987012007.png - (70.39KB , 700x550 , 97.png )
935030

>Why is the picture of people we see as food always a chicken leg.
Because it’s something that’s easy to draw and is instantly recognizable as food even at a gl- you mean, you like chicken?
>It's Karn’s choice. You can't force someone to be good, only convince them to try to change. Stop threatening to eat him, for starters.
It’s indeed Karn’s choice if he wants to change… but if he don’t… well, you can’t let him continue and there’s only one way you can make sure he doesn’t.
>There you go with that word again. At least state their sins when you judge them.
You can’t really smell the specific sins, so you have to find those out some other way. The one thing that the smell tells you is if they’ve bathed themselves in someone’s soul, as in, killed someone.

>He didn't have a diary? Or anything like that? No clues as to who he's dealing with?
He had a diary, but it was filled with entries about makeup and pretty butterflies. Nothing about what he was doing here...
>How long will Tertian stay fresh?
The swords said a day or two before you absorb him no matter if you want to or not. So… he’s fresh until at least tomorrow evening?
>I wonder if his bedroom is soundproof? That would make it an excellent interrogation location. Any way to tell?
You can only guess that it is, but you have no idea what to look for to see if it actually is. This is quite the good place to use as a base, though, as long as no one else comes here regularly.

>Once we're done, vomit up the insect inside the house and give 'er a brand new hole on the neck.
And waste a perfectly good meal? No way. She’s food.
>Spit out our hiver girl & tie her up and I guess make conversation some more through the hours as we wait for drugs to get out of her system.
Hmm… not here. At least, not now. Maybe tomorrow?
>Strip down the bug & test for chinks in the chitin, bodily features of note, where her sex hole is, areas of sensitivity on her hiver body are, all in the pursuit of fucking the brains out of a hive-I mean acquiring scholarly on hands knowledge for future slaying of evil.
That’s… um… you’re pretty sure she wouldn’t actually agree to that and… you’re justice, you’re supposed to protect the innocent by removing the evil in the world. Not fuck it against their will.
>It would be consensual if she’s high at the time of inspection. Loophole acquired.
…that’s not how that works. That’s not how it works at all!
>Actually maybe we can put her to use on the side of good by drugging her back up to cloud 9 & keeping her there after we’re done with extracting info out of the hiver while she’s sober.
Yeah, no, you’re pretty sure keeping her constantly drugged will end badly. An easier way to turn her to the side of good? Absorb her and take her form. After she’s sobered up, of course.

>Still don't think it's a good idea to digest her now or later. We do inherit slight impulses from those we eat - don't want one to be "crippling drug addiction".
You usually only experience them when you’re in the form of the person in question, so if it’s to crippling you’ll simple not use it.
>We easily got rid of Vivian’s impulses when we turned into her the first time. And when we turned into her in front of Karn, Ema didn’t have any sort of reaction towards Karn that would suggest that those impulses still remained.
Well, there was this huge urge to punch Karn in his smug face as well as plowing him like a field in spring. Not sure if that was just you or Vivi, though. Who wouldn’t want to punch a smug male like Karn in the face after all, Ohoho…

>Let's not stay here. There's no telling if those "twins" will show up.
You rather meet those two on your own terms, so let’s get out of here even if it means leaving most of the sweet booty behind.
>Head for Oran to spend the night with him.
Great idea. He’s bound to have somewhere you can sleep! And you know he’s home!
>Maybe you can gobble these things up? I mean, you can do it with the swords, right?
The swords are part of you, thus they can become one with you at will. Otherwise you can only consume living things, you know, like people. Besides, anything organic would still be digested… and the coin would be corroded beyond use. As for the drugs… yeah, no.

>First up, pour out all the drugs.
Into the sink they go! Woo!
>Bury or hide the probably illegal sleeping drugs in a place only you will know to look.
…you guess you can bury it outside in one of the flower beds?
>Just take some of the gold - a decent amount, but not enough to where you jingle like a greedy gold goblin.
You fill all your pockets with sweet, sweet gold! GOLD!
>Grab what you think you need for a breastplate to protect your core. Try to buy one that's small enough to be concealed under your clothes.
There’s definitely enough here for a breastplate, don’t you worry.
> I'm not sure how to handle the clothes, aside from packing them in a suitcase or something.
…or you can just grab one of the boxes, you guess? While you can’t grab everything, one box would be enough, no?
>Make sure you get some that are Varkian sized and Serpent shaped, since you've also got Varkian and Serpent forms.
You make sure to grab at least one pair for each form you already have…
>Better include some Hiver shaped clothes for when we eventually get a Hiver form.
…and another two for your up and coming forms. Oh, and then you add a few extra, just to fill out the box completely.
>Also, we're totally taking that pimpin' wizard hat. +5 to pussy slaying when you wear one of those.
Well, duh.

>Use your Bird guy form, just in case.
Right, beerd form it is! You bet this sweet wizard hat looks awesome on your feathery head!
>Turn off all the lights, lock all the doors and windows, leave the house. Make sure you bring the key with you.
You turn off the few lights that were still on and make sure everything is locked up tight before you take your leave with the key.
>You'll sneak past curfew no problem; As you've proven in both the forest and the sewers, you're worlds better at sneaking than you are at, well, anything remotely social or cerebral.
Sneaking around someone is way easier then navigating the mine field that is social interaction, okay? Anyway, you’re off towards Oran’s for the night, with a ton of gold, a box full of clothes and a belly full of girl! This mission was a huge success!
>>
No. 935031 ID: 1301e8
File 155987012969.png - (82.75KB , 700x550 , 98.png )
935031

You’re sure Oran will have a sofa or something for you to sleep on, as you’re not really in the mood to sleep in one of those bath tubs Serpents sleeps in.

End of thread stats:

Kills: 10
Items: 4
Secrets: 0
Consumed: 4

Allies: 6
Enemies: 134
Forms: 5

Cheeses: 2
Grains of Dust: still 0
Mating Presses: 2

Hardest fight: Terroza’s fat ass.

Current rating: B. (As in, you went balls deep into Alisa.)

Tips: Make sure to eat all the sinners, friends or foe. The more you feed the more powerful you’ll become and more food will become available to be consumed.
>>
No. 935032 ID: eeb7d9

>Tips: Make sure to eat all the sinners, friends or foe. The more you feed the more powerful you’ll become and more food will become available to be consumed.
Evil Kaktus! Stop that!

Also, 134 enemies?! Really? How come?
>>
No. 935033 ID: b1b4f3

>>935030
>Ema is good at sneaking
I thought we picked the warrior archetype? Oh well.

>>935031
Oh dear that's a lot of enemies.
>>
No. 935034 ID: 91ee5f

>>935031
>Hardest fight: Terroza’s fat ass.
She wasn’t fat, she was all muscle! Though, I guess when we turn into her we can check for ourselves.

>Tips: Make sure to eat all the sinners, friends or foe. The more you feed the more powerful you’ll become and more food will become available to be consumed.
Friends are not food!
>>
No. 935036 ID: 10c408

>>935032
Word is most likely spreading. We've been mostly very careful, but making high profile targets like vivian and terroza vanish into thin air doesn't mean no one's gonna notice their sudden absence from reality.
>>
No. 935055 ID: 1301e8
File 155993739908.jpg - (305.88KB , 1920x1080 , Welcome to Egypt.jpg )
935055

>I thought we picked the warrior archetype? Oh well.
Cracking heads is even easier than sneaking.
>She wasn’t fat, she was all muscle!
Oh, she likes to say that, didn’t she?
>Friends are not food!
Friend and food is basically the same word, if you disregard the middle part!
>Also, 134 enemies?! Really? How come?
Who cares! More food!

-----------------------------------

Last time on Polnareff Peculiar Pursuit…

:BoneraffBC: Your mother was hamster and your father smell of elderberries!
:JosephBC: *GASP* How dare you insult my hamster! Have at thee, you elderly milkmaid!
:BoneraffBC: Milkmaid? How appropriate, because you fight like a COW! Hon hon hon!
:AvdolBC: His insults are too strong, Mr. Joestar! We have no choice but to retreat!
:KakyoinBC: To the sea! Only a mitey pirate can teach us how to defend against such insults!
:JotaroBC: Yare yare daze…

---------

:KakyoinBC: -and that proves once and for all that COMMUNISM is the superior ideology when it comes to the amount of booty calls per capital.
:HolBC: OH NO! BASIC LOGIC! MY AND ‘MERICAN ONE WEAKNESS! CURSE YOU!
:StroheimBC: Something that’s more powerful than SCIENCE!? I did nazi that coming! I admit defeat.
:AvdolBC: …nothing of what you just said made any sense, Mr. Kakyoin.
:KakyoinBC: Shhh, not so loud.
:JotaroBC: Yare yare daze…

--------

:BoneraffBC: My name is Polnareff. You killed my sister. Prepare to die!
:HolBC: Silly Polnareff, guns don’t kill people, violent video games does!
:BoneraffBC: …wait, didn’t we already do this joke last ti-
:HolBC: The only way to stop this wave of violence is to introduce more gambling! By adding loot boxes to every game and forcing all the children to become heavily in debt gambling addicts can we make ‘merica somewhat decent again!
:BoneraffBC: …you don’t want them to have any money so they can’t buy weapons?
:HolBC: What? NO! It’s our AMERICAN RIGHT to have guns! As president, I promise that there will be a loot box in every game and two guns in every newborn hand! Only by giving toddler gun can we fight gun violence! Vote Hol Horse in the 1989 election!
:BoneraffBC: Sacre bleu! You’re a worse monster than I thought! Die monster, you don’t belong in this wo- wait, you don’t left hands! That means you didn’t kill my sister! Pardon, but it seems like I’ve mistaken you for someone else.
:HolBC: Don’t mention it, it happens all the time. Good luck with murdering someone in cold blood… like a real ‘merican!
:BoneraffBC: Adieu.

-------

:AvdolBC: We’re finally here, Mr. Joestar. In Egypt.
:JosephBC: Ah, to finally reach our destination after such a long and dangerous journey. Why, to just think back to the many perils we conquered on the way here…
>>
No. 935056 ID: 1301e8
File 155993741197.jpg - (119.47KB , 1280x720 , Just another plane.jpg )
935056

:NonFoS: This is your captain speaking. We are currently leaving Japan airspace in will be arriving in Egypt, Cairo in 16 hours. Today’s movie will be… The Last Airbender: The movie on and endless loop. Please have a pleasant flight.
:JosephBC: OH MY GAAAD! This is the end of us!
:KakyoinBC: My only regret is not banging everyone’s mom!
:AvdolBC: Stay strong. We can make it if we work together.
:JotaroBC: I love that movie.
:BoneraffBC: Peanuts? Where are the croissants? You wound my honor with this insolence!
>>
No. 935057 ID: 1301e8
File 155993742494.jpg - (94.29KB , 1200x630 , Dio's EVIL lair.jpg )
935057

:KakyoinBC: Perils? We sat on a plane for 16 hours and absolutely nothing happened.
:JosephBC: Nothing happened? We almost lost Jotaro to those dastardly peanuts!
:AvdolBC: I didn’t even know he was allergic to peanuts.
:JotaroBC: I’m not. I just ate a few to many too fast.
:JosephBC: But none of that matters, as we have finally arrived at DIO’s dastardly LAIR! BEHOLD!
:AvdolBC:
:KakyoinBC:
:JotaroBC: … Yare yare daze…
:KakyoinBC: That’s a McDonalds?
:AvdolBC: Mr. Joestar, are you sure this is-
:JosephBC: Of course I’m sure! Have you ever seen such an evil place ever before!? It’s clearly been corrupted by DIO’s very presence!

:JosephBC: Now, we’ll need a plan. You can’t simply walk into a McDonalds and-
:BoneraffBC: Times up. Let’s do this! Hon Hon Hon!
:JosephBC: OLLLYYY SHEEET! Polnareff just went in! Quick, come up with a plan before DIO kills us all with his awesome powers!!
>>
No. 935058 ID: b1b4f3

>>935057
Okay the best way to fight against an enemy stand is to figure out what its power is and then counter it.
So let's watch Polnareff get his ass handed to him, and use that information to figure out how to fight DIO.
If he starts fighting someone who isn't DIO just pile in there and help.
>>
No. 935059 ID: eeb7d9

The amount of references you managed to pull out of your ass is incredible. I am actually dumbfounded. Do it again. Please.

>>935057
Buy a shit ton of garlic.
>>
No. 935082 ID: 7fafab

>>935057
Cease with your vile Chinese cartoon antics.
I won't allow this on my good Christian website.
>>
No. 935183 ID: 1301e8
File 156003067758.png - (0.97MB , 914x852 , KFB.png )
935183

>Buy a shit ton of garlic.
:JosephBC: GREAT IDEA! Wait… I have an even better idea! Quick, Kakyoin, go and buy all the garlic bread you can find!
:AvdolBC: …why garlic bread, Mr. Joestar.
:JosephBC: Because it’s delicious! Not even a master vampire like DIO can resist the urge to eat garlic bread!
:KakyoinBC: And you’re sending me because…
:JosephBC: So that you’ll be conveniently gone at the start of the fight with DIO. That way, when everything looks lost, you can come to the rescue… and then get horribly murdered.
:KakyoinBC: Wait, what was that last part?
:JosephBC: RUN, KAKYOIN, RUN! We need that garlic bread!

>Okay the best way to fight against an enemy stand is to figure out what its power is and then counter it.
:AvdolBC: But Mr. Joestar, the only way to figure out his stand power is to see it in action.
:JosephBC: Exactly!
:AvdolBC: …don’t tell me we’re going to let Polnareff get his ass handed to him just to get some information?
:JosephBC: Why do we care what happens to him? It’s Polnareff!
:JotaroBC: Besides, if anyone would survive a fight with DIO it would be Polnareff. You know how brave those Frenchmen are and how they can never surrender! I bet he would survive even something like getting all his limbs chopped off before being thrown from a cliff into the sea… though he’d probably need to possess a stand using turtle or something after that…
:AvdolBC: That does make sense… except for the turtle part, at least. Now, what’s he doing? Is he still in good shape?
:JotaroBC: He’s… eating?

:BoneraffBC: Om nom nom! At least I got chicken!
:JosephBC: What’s going on? Why haven’t DIO or one of his underlings attacked him yet?
:JotaroBC: A better question is where did you get those chicken wings? These is a McDonalds, not a KFC.
:AvdolBC: MAGICAN RED!? NOOO!!! HE’S EATING HIM! HE’S EATING MY STAND!
:JosephBC: And then his going to eat me! OH MAH GAAAAAD!!!
:AvdolBC: What? No, he… what?
:BoneraffBC: Spicy!
:JosephBC: But where is D-
>>
No. 935184 ID: 1301e8
File 156003068932.png - (974.90KB , 914x852 , KFDIO.png )
935184

:DioBC: You expected the first chicken wing to be spicy? TO BAD! IT WAS ME, DIO!
:JosephBC: *GASP* DIO! HE WAS THE FRIED CHICKEN ALL ALONG!
:AvdolBC: …what.
:JotaroBC: …how?
:BoneraffBC: …did I just… eat… what?
:AvdolBC: …what.
:JotaroBC: This doesn’t even…
:AvdolBC: No, seriously… what.
>>
No. 935185 ID: 1301e8
File 156003070468.jpg - (161.52KB , 1280x720 , Vanilla ICE.jpg )
935185

:JosephBC: DIO! What dastardly plan do you have in store for us!?
:JotaroBC: And why are you in a McDonalds?
:DioBC: …Because I, DIO, work here?
:AvdolBC: …an all-powerful vampire works… at a McDonalds?
:DioBC: Even an immortal vampire needs to earn his bread after all. Do you know how expensive bread crumbs are? Trust me, I, DIO, have counted every one.

:DioBC: I, DIO, is wondering what do you three wish to order? Our tasty burgers will ANNIHILATE your taste buds!
:JosephBC: WATCH OUT! HE GOT KNIVES!
:DioBC: You’ll need a knife if you want to DECIMATE our fine burgers. Now, how about I, DIO, put on some of my favorite music and-
:JosephBC: WATCH OUT! HE GOT A CD OF VANILLA ICE!
:DioBC: The only thing you need to watch out from these sweet tunes is how they will ASSASINATE your ear drums! Trust me, I, DIO, got only good intentions with-
:JosephBC: WATCH OUT! HE GOT GOOD INTENTIONS!
:DioBC: *Sigh* I, DIO, would EXTERMINATE for a better job right now…

:JosephBC: Avdol, quick, attack him before he can put that cd on! We have no protection something so… so… WHITE!
:AvdolBC: How!? Polnareff ate my fucking stand!
:JotaroBC: Yeah, about that… aren’t you supposed to be dead because of-
:JosephBC: NO TIME FOR THAT! Quick, Avdol, act like my stand!
:AvdolBC: …what?
:JosephBC: I will control you! Like Pokemon battle! Quick! Attack!
:AvdolBC: …if that is your wish, Mr. Joestar.
:JosephBC: Avdol, use… let’s see…

Choose an attack for Avdol.
A) Self-destruct.
B) Explosion.
C) Final Gambit.
D) High Jump Kick.

:AvdolBC: WHAT THE FUCK IS MY MOVE SET!? I don’t want to do any of those!
:DioBC: You know, I would consider this quite rude. I only wanted to offer you gents a glass of fine Chianti with some of my favorite music and you’re already trying to EXTIRPATE me. Quite rude indeed.
:JotaroBC: Yare yare daze…
>>
No. 935190 ID: 4854ef

You fools! You are in a Mcdonalds and he works there! You must ask for the mystical.. Hot Coffee.. Even DIO cannot deal with the power of Lawyers!
>>
No. 935192 ID: eeb7d9

DIO, if you trully work here, then you must know... is the ice cream machine, BROKEN?!
>>
No. 935193 ID: a9af05

>>935185
If he works here, then you must invoke the name of McDonald's greatest rival! That's right, you must call upon the Burger King!
>>
No. 936579 ID: 1301e8
File 156107067301.jpg - (479.85KB , 1280x720 , Isummonthee.jpg )
936579

>You fools! You are in a Mcdonalds and he works there! You must ask for the mystical… Hot Coffee… Even DIO cannot deal with the power of Lawyers!
:DioBC: I, DIO, will serve you a cup of coffee that will ERADICATE YOU…r taste buds. Here we go.
:JosephBC: HAH! You fell right in my trap! Now I’ll simply spill this in my… lap… wait, what does this say? “Caution: Contents VERY HOT & VERY DELICIOUS! This small label makes McDonalds and DIO completely immune to lawsuits.”!? What in the world!?
:DioBC: Haha! I, DIO, have already seen through your pathetic attempts to harm me! It’s useless! MUDA MUDA Mu…eh, you get the idea…
:JosephBC: But… it was such a perfect…
:DioBC: Also, you forgot to pick up the optional lawyer PC in the first chapter.
:JosephBC: Curses!
:AvdolBC: …at least I don’t have to do one of those suicide moves…

>DIO, if you truly work here, then you must know... is the ice cream machine, BROKEN?!
:DioBC: …no, it’s fully functional.
:JotaroBC: HA! Then you’ll… wait, what?
:DioBC: Also, that’s a bit of a myth. The machine isn’t usually broken, they are usually just being cleaned and maintained, which takes over 4 hours at the best of times.
:JotaroBC: But… that means…
:DioBC: I, DIO, simply never CLEAN OUR ICE CREAM MACHINE!
:JotaroBC: YOU MONSTER! How dare you serve bad McFlurries!?
:DioBC: …this is a fast-food restaurant so… yes?
:BoneraffBC: He got a point. Also, one McFlurry please.
:DioBC: I, DIO, will be very happy to serve you that in a moment.
:AvdolBC: …after all, I really like being alive… really, really like being alive…

>If he works here, then you must invoke the name of McDonald's greatest rival! That's right, you must call upon the Burger King!
:JosephBC: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Burger King R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.
:AvdolBC: What are you doing, you fool! You’re calling upon powers far beyond anything a mortal is meant to control!
:JosephBC: I am simply calling upon the King! Do not worry, I will be in charge of it!
:AvdolBC: Trifling American! Your arrogance will be your undoing!
:BoneraffBC: … … …so, is something supposed to happen? This is kind of an anticlimax…
:JotaroBC: Yare yare daze…
:JosephBC: Any second now…
:DioBC: YOU FOOL! You are in the heart of nest of its greatest rival! THE ONE WHO CANNOT BE NAMED HAS NO POWER HERE!
:JosephBC: I’m pretty sure I can see a burger king from here, actually…
>>
No. 936580 ID: 1301e8
File 156107068448.jpg - (78.23KB , 1280x720 , ThisIsYourBrain.jpg )
936580

:DioBC: BUT ENOUGH OF THESE PATHETIC DISTRACTIONS! IT’S TIME FOR ME, DIO, to show my hospitality to my guests! I’ll buy you all a McFlurry while we listen to my favorite song from Vanilla ICE. Let me just put this into the cd player and…
:AvdolBC: WHAT!? NO! STO-

*Click*
:VanillaBC: Yo, VIP, let’s kick it!
>>
No. 936581 ID: 1301e8
File 156107069490.jpg - (5.88KB , 299x168 , OnVanillaIce.jpg )
936581

:AvdolBC: GAAHH!! GRGRLGRUGLE FLESHTRUMBONE EGUH!
*Implosion sound!*
:VanillaBC: Ice ice baby!

:BoneraffBC: AVDOL! NOOO!!
:VanillaBC: Ice Ice baby!
:JotaroBC: WHAT HAPPENED!? He just exploded!?
:VanillaBC: All right stop.
:JosephBC: …it… it was just too much! Vanilla ICE is so white that Avdol simply ceased to exist!
:VanillaBC: Collaborate and listen.
:DioBC: I, DIO, must apologize for the inconvenience.
:VanillaBC: Ice is back with my brand new invention.
:DioBC: I did not mean for your friend to be out whited from existence.
:VanillaBC: Something that grabs a hold of me tightly.

:JosephBC: Eh, don’t worry. At least he died on the sacred grounds of his people.
:VanillaBC: Then I flow that a harpoon daily and nightly.
:DioBC: …in a McDonalds?
:VanillaBC: Will it ever stop?
:JosephBC: Yes.
:VanillaBC: Yo, I don't know.
:DioBC: …I, DIO, is an ancient psychopath vampire mass murderer and even I think what you just say is fucked up. You should be ashamed of yours-
>>
No. 936582 ID: 1301e8
File 156107070481.jpg - (72.70KB , 1280x720 , HaveItYourWay.jpg )
936582

*Knife in throat sound.mp3*
:JosephBC: Grlk!?
:VanillaBC: Turn off the lights and I'll glow.
:BoneraffBC: NOT AVDOL! NOOO!!
:VanillaBC: To the extreme, I rock a- wait, is anyone actually reading these lyrics anymore?
:JosephBC: I am the dead?
:VanillaBC: I’m pretty sure I can say whatever I want here and no one would notice.
:JotaroBC: Who threw that knife!? Where did it come from!?
:VanillaBC: Avdol death was an inside job!
:DioBC: Oh no… I, DIO, sense a dark, evil presence with us! A being from beyond the veil, a horror so terrifying that even to gaze upon it will drive you mad! The monster in your nightmare, the mother of a thousand screaming young, the endless one that is prophesied to consume all creation!
:VanillaBC: Kaktus is a dork.
>>
No. 936583 ID: 1301e8
File 156107071251.jpg - (478.81KB , 765x628 , HeComes.jpg )
936583

:DioBC: IT IS THE BURGER KING, EATER OF FRIES!
:VanillaBC: Yo, this is some messed up shit.
:JotaroBC: The what in the what now?
:VanillaBC: That’s it, I’m done here. ICE, OUT!
:DioBC: Everyone, stand very still. It hunts by sight! As long as we, DIO AND GANG, stands still, we will be fine!
:BoneraffBC: But he has a pair of burgers…
:DioBC: It’s a trap! Don’t fall for its evil-
>>
No. 936584 ID: 1301e8
File 156107072198.png - (741.85KB , 754x894 , YOUCANNOTRUN.png )
936584

:BoneraffBC: I’m going for it! Cover my back!
:DioBC: French man I don’t know the name of, NOOO!!!
:JotaroBC: HORY SHEEET!
:JosephBC: *Cough* That’s my grandson… *Cough*
:JotaroBC: IT’S COMING RIGHT FOR US! RUN!
:BoneraffBC: BUT BURGERS!?


https://youtu.be/cPCLFtxpadE?t=40
To be continued?
Watch the thrilling conclusion next time on… DIO AND THE GAND MYSTERY HOUR!
>>
No. 936587 ID: 91ee5f

>I, DIO
Someone’s been watching antfish’s jojo abridged.

>>936582
>wait, is anyone actually reading these lyrics anymore?
Yes.

>I’m pretty sure I can say whatever I want here and no one would notice.
Nope, we’ll notice.

>Kaktus is a dork.
Yes, they are.
>>
No. 936595 ID: eeb7d9

> I’m pretty sure I can say whatever I want here and no one would notice.
Think again asshole!

>Kaktus is a dork.
Agreed.

I wish i could post a image here, related to the song for >>936584, but last time i did that, i got ban.
>>
No. 936596 ID: eeb7d9

Oh wait, i can just do this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9EjTAgiswM
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