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File 134002288336.png - (129.77KB , 700x700 , 1.png )
423771 No. 423771 ID: c811c4

Today is the day that I have come to a revelation! It's so simple, I'm legitimately embarrassed.

I have clothes, water, and if the fish would bite, food! But! I have realized what I lack in life. And perhaps it's the single most important thing! Stories. Real ones.

I can make up stories until my face is blue, but I have nothing real! No experiences to at least ground the exaggerations in truth! Today, I must change this.

Alas, I have little idea of how, to simply put it, 'go out and make a story.'
729 posts omitted. Last 50 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 428589 ID: 44b4ea
File 134133031222.png - (48.22KB , 700x700 , 121.png )
428589

>Have you chosen the Lich over the Drake
I don't know! The Drake can seem outwardly crass, but I would not abandon any hope that she is worth seeing what lies underneath. In any case, I am visiting her again regardless!

"So, uh, what's your name? If you don't mind saying, of course."
>"Zirkala."
"It's a nice one."
>"You're a bundle of compliments."
"By the way, I'm no kiss-and-tell, but might it be bad if I share this tale? I have suspect that no one would believe it, anyway!"
>"You're right, no one would. If you do, do me a favor and swap out names, places, even species and so forth just in case some bumbling fool actually is correct for some terrible reason."
"Consider it done! Also, I must ask a potentially awkward question!"
>"You are getting more comfortable around me than I might like, Story Seeker."
"Ah, well, I am wondering if you would believe that this means that you own me, in a sense of, am I allowed to lay wit -"
>"What am I, your girlfriend? This is a romp in a haysack, not marriage. I'm not going to be your clingy girlfriend, go do whatever out there."
"Last question! I notice you can shift back and forth between your living and undead forms. What other tricks do you know?" I am sure to make a movement down below to accentuate what I mean by this.
>"This form isn't living, it's a recreation. Secondly, my tricks are best done by demonstration."
>>
No. 428590 ID: 44b4ea
File 134133032012.png - (84.88KB , 700x700 , 122.png )
428590

Some time later...
Well that sure was a demonstration.

>Did you start this as a virgin?
Certainly not! While the other kobolds may not like me greatly, that fact does not stand in the way all the time!

>Make sure to kiss her before she gets up.
Consider it done and then some.

>"It's time for us to get out of here. I've set your payment down. 800 gold for the pile of fake gold, I'm presuming that's going to the Drake. And for your services rendered, you may have another 800 gold for yourself. I'll also throw in the armor, non-magic this time, and have it delivered to you when you are ready. Until then, you look fine in bedsheets."

Which begs the question, what shall I spend my own gold on? There is little I need it for aside from luxuries, which do make me stand out more, and I would no object to giving some or all to the drake to further bolster her hoard.
>>
No. 428595 ID: 886a4d

Buy some clothes, give the rest to the drake.
>>
No. 428597 ID: 7c31d2

Get a musical instrument of some kind, bards are supposed to be able to play music!
If possible, get it enchanted to it'll teleport to you if you lose it.
>>
No. 428601 ID: d84501

>>428590

First off, buy some nice gifts for everyone involved.

Then I'm in conflict if we should go repay the Goblin village, as I'm pretty damn sure that at least 7 female gobbos saw your masculine Kobold glory, and while we have cash it might be a good idea to make sure we don't get fucked over in the future.
>>
No. 428603 ID: c6ec33

Point out that she probably *didn't* need to bring you all the way here in order to seduce you. Although it *was* pretty kinky, and waking up next to her wearing her skull-head was an experience you'll probably never forget... Ahem. Kiss her, thank her for an amazing time, and politely offer that any time she wants a little more of your companionship, consider it done. And that extends beyond sex of course - she must not get many visitors, and the company of a bard isn't the worst possible company she could have...

Now, see if Zirkala can suggest any magic items that might be useful to you. She's almost undoubtedly the best person to give such assessments. The items that might be best would be those that would keep us out of trouble. Things that might lighten your load (so you can run faster), things that might just make you run faster directly, things that might make you more stealthy, etc. Maybe things that might make you have more charisma or be more convincing, but I have a feeling it's better for you to level-up your bardly charms without magic. Maybe something that enhances memory? It would be useful for storytelling, and if it worked while drunk, all the better...

Also, although you may not really be the magey type, ask if there's any, uh, special tricks that she could teach *you* how to do in bed...

Out of curiosity, ask her why you didn't see any lizardfolk women here. Do they stay inside the huts all day? And maybe get some tips on how to get the lizardmen to NOT kill you and/or rob you for your stuff, as almost happened at the front gate. In fact, you're a bard, why don't you tell her that story before you have to go past him? :)
>>
No. 428604 ID: 9718f3

It miiight be a good idea to go pay for that scroll. Maybe. Since (at least some of) the goblins know what you look like as a kobold. And it would be useful to possibly be able to interact with them in the future, without having to worry (more than usual) about being enslaved or killed.
>>
No. 428605 ID: bdb3f8

You need a fine hat. It is somewhat traditional for proper Don Juan bards.
>>
No. 428617 ID: a2fa74

>>428590
Pay somebody to teach you the cantrip Summon Instrument.
Also, prestidigitation so you can always have things like flowers ready.
>>
No. 428620 ID: 42c1c6

Well, you've got cash.

My suggestion, buy a lute, and find someone who'll teach you to play it (and maybe a few songs). You've got some good stories, now it's time to expand into the more traditional bardly fare.

Also, you need a hat. A broad one with a feather in it.
>>
No. 428635 ID: 44b4ea
File 134134576018.png - (60.07KB , 700x700 , 123.png )
428635

>Pay for the goblin scroll
I most certainly will!

"While I'm flattered that you would consider me easy on the eyes in a bedsheet, I feel that I must purchase better! For instance, a hat, possibly with a feather, would be nice, as with a lute."
>"Where are we, young kobold? A human city? We are in the lizardman fort, you will find sufficient armor, weapons and survival tools, and little more."
"Oh, well then, maybe.. not. Also, I have been thinking I would like to learn a little magic! Maybe summon an instrument, a little prestidi... prestitidita... tion, and such!"
>"When I said it took months to learn how to form the tiniest candleflame around your finger, I was not exaggerating. At least, not for people who have no innate magic ability, such as yourself. You are ill suited, even if your intelligence doesn't provide a barrier. You want clothes like that, go to a human town. You want magic like that, I don't know what to tell you. If you just want potions or magic stuff, I'll sell you stuff I don't need. Later. Don't you have better things to do right now?"
>>
No. 428641 ID: a3b384

"Of course, but I thought we didn't have time for a third go."

As grand as your aspirations may be, you still know precious little about the world. But you are the Story Seeker, so ask her where you would go to seek new stories. And then equip yourself towards that end. You may need to get a mount of some kind. And learn to ride, if you haven't yet. The drake can keep the change.
>>
No. 428649 ID: 299ed3

>>428641
That's getting kind of clingy

"If you ever want another round, I'll always be up for it."
>>
No. 428650 ID: b0ef59

To the Drake!

also >>428649
>>
No. 428651 ID: 09e5bf

Just buy normal clothing. Then ask about getting the armor she was talking about. Depending on how long that'll take, Story Seeker can get the money back to the drake.
>>
No. 428652 ID: bdb3f8

aww, he was upgraded to Story Seeker there briefly. Too much faffing about though, back to Yapper. Better get a move on.
>>
No. 428656 ID: 6e44d2

>>428649
Even that's unnecessary.

"Yep! Later!"

Then you leave.
>>
No. 428664 ID: d84501

>>428635

"Yeah, I better get on that, but if you ever need something a lowly Kobold such as myself can do, please, don't hesitate to ask!"
>>
No. 428675 ID: b56d6e

No need to get affectionate. She doesn't seem to be in the mood anymore. Just give her a "Farewell Zirkala." or something like that when you leave.

Ask how much a potion or item of invisibility would set you back. That kind of thing is just pure story material. Also consider buying some better traveling gear. Going to a human city for some nice clothes might be a good idea after you've seen the Drake.
>>
No. 428679 ID: 2ce513

>>428635
I still feel the lich is our best bet. She showed herself willingly, unlike the drayk that sent us on several suicide missions.

In the long run, you can weigh it as "cute kobold girl as the occasional fling" or "pissy mini-dragon"
>>
No. 428691 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135201869.png - (60.01KB , 700x700 , 124.png )
428691

"But something has been on my mind! Where have all the females been?"
>"They're more nomadic. They tend to be the ones that go out hunting, while the men defend and do the closer to home battles. And no, I do not recommend them, for what good that will do. They are as cruel as the men."
"Then I will no longer bug you, but I will be available! Farewell!"

And with that, I head off to the drake. I hear a thump when she opens the closet door while I open the front door. The less I know, the better!

>Ask about how much a potion or item of invisibility
I feel that I may have overstayed my welcome, but I will attempt to ask this at some point in the future!

>Ask about where one would go for stories
I will also ask of this in the near future, perhaps after I give the drake a visit.
>>
No. 428692 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135202726.png - (87.34KB , 700x700 , 125.png )
428692

And to the drake!

"Good morning, Lady Dragon!"
>"You're back. I hope for more than just an illusion, considering that you've been gone all night. Why are... did you just go and sleep with more goblins or something?"
>>
No. 428694 ID: c891d3

>>428692
"Lizardfolk this time actually."

Give her the gold. That might raise her spirits a bit, eh?
>>
No. 428695 ID: 299ed3

I suppose you could say I boned someone.
>>
No. 428699 ID: bdb3f8

>>428692
"No. If you will recall, I was asking about lizardfolk illusions." And just leave it at that.
>>
No. 428700 ID: b0ef59

>>428695
>>
No. 428701 ID: 09e5bf

Simply say no, and give the drake her money.
>>
No. 428702 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135290844.png - (81.99KB , 700x700 , 126.png )
428702

"You could say that I boned a lizardgirl this time!"
>"Don't - don't actually say it, kobold, I don't want to hear about your bed life! I can smell the lizard and the goblins and the fish! Take a bath!"

I will save enough to pay for the goblin's scroll, and perhaps a spare set of clothes, plus enough for a good hat and instrument that I am sorely lacking in! But for the rest, I give it all to the drake.

It goes over quite well! Especially considering that perhaps I do need to bathe. In fact, I haven't eaten since leaving the fishing pond! I've been subsisting on goblin booze, which may explain a great deal.
>>
No. 428704 ID: 14a1d0

>>428702
Bathe together
>>
No. 428708 ID: c891d3

>>428704
Hahahaha.

... Yes.
>>
No. 428709 ID: d7e757

>>428704
Yes.
>>
No. 428710 ID: 886a4d

Perhaps you should save a gold piece for some food then, unless you feel like more fishing.
>>
No. 428716 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135452231.png - (57.53KB , 700x700 , 127.png )
428716

"But you are correct, miss Dragon! I am in requirement of a bath. Perhaps you would care to join me?"
>"... are you saying I need a bath, too?"
"Assuredly not! It is merely company while I clean myself off."

.....

>"Why not."

And so we end up in the very pond that I fish in! It does have a gentle current to it, so it is quite clean.

>"Thanks. I don't say thanks to many people, so appreciate it."
"Believe me, I do!"
>>
No. 428718 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135474926.png - (76.88KB , 700x700 , 128.png )
428718

It looks like I won't go hungry, either.

>"I have to go now. The dragon illusion is only so convincing for so long if I leave it alone for too long. I want to enjoy my gold, too."

Perhaps then, I should head towards the Lich to wrap up any loose ends?
>>
No. 428719 ID: 590c90

What loose ends? You don't want to annoy her by being too eager and she already mentioned that you where getting a bit too comfortable around her.
>>
No. 428720 ID: 886a4d

At the very least you can pick up that armor, however you shouldn't bother her with too many questions. Perhaps a good idea would be to ask her if theres a nearby human city that won't kill you on sight since you are in need of a hat and an instrument.
>>
No. 428721 ID: d84501

>>428718

Probably best to go pick pay for that scroll now.

Claim that you knew the dragon DID send you, but you figured she wouldn't pay anyway so you took it from your own funds.

So, y'know, tell the truth about the payment.
>>
No. 428722 ID: 299ed3

>>428721
We would probably need the goblin illusion for that.
>>
No. 428723 ID: b0ef59

Yeah drop by and pick up the armor but be quick.
>>
No. 428725 ID: d84501

>>428722

Well, we are right next to the dragon, if she asks why, claim that it's because we don't want our throat slit in the middle of the night.

So again, tell the truth.
>>
No. 428729 ID: 44b4ea
File 134135588421.png - (81.25KB , 700x700 , 129.png )
428729

>What loose ends?
Well, uh... I did have a couple more questions. And I can pick up the armor too, as to not bug her about it!

So I head off. After catching one more fish and wishing miss Dragon farewell.

"Hello, Zirkala! I hope I am not intruding!"
>"If you intrude, my guardsmen would have stopped you."Would you like to go for round 3?"
"Ah..."
>"No, no, I was kidding. I should have thought you would seriously consider that. What have you come for?"
"I figured I would spare you having to find me, since you're kind enough to give me that armor. I was also wondering if you happened to have magic items or potions that I could buy, should I have the money?"
>"Did you spend it all already? The answer is yes, regardless. I will let you browse what could be called my magic junk that lies in an uncomfortable state between being just valuable enough to keep and worthless enough to perpetually ignore."
"I am glad to hear it! And lastly, I am wondering, I have interest in leaving these caves and visiting the world. Do you know of any places that would be good to visit?"

>"Many. In fact, I am glad you stopped by. As you have likely figured, I do not actually need errands to be done so close to my territory. However, there are farther off caverns and above ground territories that I may have to pay mind to, and that lizardfolk territory was simply to see how well you handled yourself. I am pleased that you were not so foolish that you couldn't have seen it to be a prank when your armor was dispelled, but I am not so pleased to know how easy you are to get in the sack. Really, the only way I could have been more forward was to simply greet you with 'Hi, let's have sex.' This will be problematic.
>However! I was impressed that you were even suspecting that the lizard was me, and even more when you knew and did not care. Therefore, although risky, I will entrust you with legitimate errands. You will get your stories, and I will fund your journeys, and you will do various tasks, some easier than others. Furthermore, as I do not want to invest in you simply to have an embarrassingly pathetic fate, I have just finished smoothing things over with the goblins. The magic shop owner will accept your payment without attempting to punish you for the ill placed debt. So for today, rest. Do whatever it is you do. I will call on you later."
>>
No. 428731 ID: d84501

>>428729

I like her.
>>
No. 428736 ID: cf49fc

>>428731
As do I. Rarely do we get evil overlords who are so forward, honest, and willing to literally screw us instead of figuratively.
>>
No. 428745 ID: 85bd72

She is the best Lich.
>>
No. 428770 ID: bccf7b

>>428729
Ha ha! Awesome! Guess it's time to ask about what needs doing. Besides, perhaps we can get payment in the form of "magical junk" that can be bartered elsewhere...

amongst other things! Why yes, I DO plan to push this relationship! TG dating is go~
>>
No. 428794 ID: b2112e

>>428770
She will call on us later. Let's not be thick.
>>
No. 428806 ID: 9b5a1a

Right then! The first thing we really need to do is go pay for that scroll. Now, everyone seemed to buy the cursed to turn into a kobold story who heard it, and more importantly, the shopkeeper didn't hear it. So... looks like we're going to have to go back to the drake and get that same disguise back, otherwise we're going to get hauled off as a slave or something.


After that though, how about some variety? Suit up with that fancy new armor, take what cash is left over, and go venturing out to the surface world and have some new adventures!
>>
No. 428810 ID: d84501

>>428806

Man, we had sex with, judging by the picture, SIX goblins.

I would think, them being gobbos, that stuff would get around rather quickly.
>>
No. 428811 ID: 886a4d

Threads ended folks.
>>
No. 428921 ID: c6ec33

>>428729
Out of curiosity, what did she tell the goblins? :V
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